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Was this abuse or experimentation?

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Was this abuse or experimentation?

Postby czmun » Sat Nov 04, 2017 4:15 pm

I was about 11 at the time, and so was my best friend. We used to do things like play husband and wife, "house", stuff like that. I was abused around age 8 and began looking at porn around age 10 so I knew what sex was and I didn't realize what had actually been going on the few years before this, I just didn't put much thought into it, but I never told anyone because I knew what happened was wrong, if that gives any insight into this?

I remember one day asking my friend if she knew what sex was too. I didn't have any intention of doing anything, and being the age we were everyone knew the gist of it. I just wanted to know if my best friend knew the things I did, I think I was trying to find out if my life was normal.

I never forced anything and neither did she, if I wanted to play house and she said no we just did something else like watch TV or go outside or pretend we were chefs, random kid stuff. And the times she wanted to play and I said no, again, we'd just do something else.

The time I'm feeling bad about was when we licked eachother. We had already been messing around, playing house, and I got the idea to see if she wanted to. At first she was hesitant and I feel like I coerced her. It was like a "I'll show you mine if you show me yours" situation, I told her other people do it too. We didn't do a lot, we told each other we'd lick the other 10 times and then be done. She did it to me first then I did it to her, neither of us liked it. I think after that we just went to bed (it was a sleepover). I feel so guilty and disgusting because I don't know if this affected her. I know kids experiment but I don't know is this counts as just experimentation. I can't stop thinking about this and if it hurt her. :(
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Re: Was this abuse or experimentation?

Postby sprock » Sat Nov 04, 2017 8:03 pm

Personally this sounds like mutual experimentation to me - I suspect Snaga or other mods will agree tbh, but hope they will answer too :)
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