I may have been molested when i was younger

Ok this is rough. I may have been molested when younger and am now only realizing it. Im 20 i will be 21 in a couple of months. My mom told me when i was younger i use to ALWAYS say my hands were sticky. I have no memory of saying this but she said i did. The other hint is i have no memories as a child. Like literally cant remember anything. Now to the worst part. I molested both my younger brothers when i was either 12 or 13..i really cant remember. I just know i was around that age. Im in no way saying it was right but if i wasnt exposed to the stuff i wouldnt even have knew what to do.

Like i look back and cant believe i thought it was ok to do this ..or even am wondering why i did it. One brother did report it back then to a family doctor, i quickly had to get help and it all quickly ended. So the therapy back then worked. But the damage is already done.
Im wanting to try and fix it all as by going to a therapist and having them go aswell. The only problem is im afraid of getting charged. I really just want us back to normal which i know may be next to impossible but i want to.

When i say back to normal is because i can see the damage i have done. One brother seems fine and we always talk and he plays garys mod with me and he always comes in my room to just talk and we seem fine. Its the other brother that is showing it. He use to do the same thing. Hed come in my room, id be on the computer and hed play my ps3 and we would just talk. Now we barely talk and live in the same house. Last time we talked was a couple of words about a few weeks ago. I hate it. And am afraid my other brother will do the same.

I really messed up and dont want to lose them. Ive been crying for the past couple of days which i never do and have been so suicidal its not even funny. I dont have the guts to do it but its pretty damn close.

Wtf do i do??

First of all, you are not the same person you were as a child. At the very least, offer yourself the compassion of speaking to yourself like you would any other 12/13-year-old. You received therapy and stopped perpetrating and your brothers have, seemingly, been able to heal to some extent - imho that's the best outcome when a child perpetrates. At the very least, we should not be punishing children like we do adults. You wouldn't expect a child of that age to die or be killed for their actions. So don't expect it of yourself.

Since this is out in the open do you think it would be useful to your brothers to talk about the past with them with another adult present? It there any way for you to safely assess whether you could do this without upsetting them?

I think the first thing to do is to discuss this with your therapist. It seems very likely indeed that you are going to get in legal trouble since this is already on record. People very rarely get charged years later for things they did when they were 12/13.