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Open Discussions about Remorse Issues.
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by LanternJack » Tue Mar 07, 2017 5:40 pm
I have posted in this forum before.. i have since discovered that i have OCD, which is why i also post in that forum.. but i also think that my issue may belong in here..
While i was as exchange student in the U.S 6 years ago (when i was 17) i went to an after school club with kids of all ages (9-18). I decided to masturbate in one of the toilet stalls a few times, thinking that it was a private spot.. and not because i was turned on by children or anything like that..
I also keep focusing on a memory, me and my friend ( i was 17 and he was 19) wanted to have a threesome with a one of our girl friends (she was 16) and she was considering it, but then i found out that it could be illegal which i didn't know so we didn't do it.
Do i actually have a reason to feel remorse over this? because i truly do..
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LanternJack
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by sprock » Thu Mar 09, 2017 11:56 pm
No, you absolutely don't because a bathroom stall is a private space and it is not unreasonable to masturbate there. Clearly the fact that younger children than yourself were also in the same building was no relevant. If you had gone ahead with the threesome, there might have been reason for guilt/remorse, but you as soon as you discovered that she was too young to consent you immediately abandoned the idea, which was absolutely the right thing to do - so, in fact, you made the moral choice.
You're not a horrible person in the slightest!
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by LanternJack » Fri Mar 10, 2017 8:46 am
I suppose i am too hard on myself, and it's quite possibly because i have OCD.
I guess i feel guilty because i initially said yes, and then figuring out afterward that it could be illegal in multiple ways afterward.
1. Me and her engaging in sexual conduct may be legal.
2. The 19 year old was technically a volunteer at the club, making it even more illegal.
3. The fact that he was an adult and we weren't.
I might be worried that the law wants to punish me along with the 19 year old. Even though i agreed but actually never wanted to do it because it felt wrong.. the 19 year old could be guilty of things like "luring a minor" and "sexual conduct with a minor", i am scared shitless that even though i did the right thing thst i could be punished still.
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by sprock » Fri Mar 10, 2017 9:11 pm
I very, very much doubt it. The 19-year-old should arguably feel some real remorse and perhaps concern over being arrested, but not you! As you note yourself, you were also a minor/child in that situation. Please try not to worry about it!
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by LanternJack » Sat Mar 11, 2017 11:07 am
Thank you for replying Sprock

It's a big help, truthfully.
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by sprock » Tue Mar 14, 2017 2:55 pm
That's great!
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by LanternJack » Tue Mar 14, 2017 4:15 pm
It's super hard though right now... It happened 6 almost 7 years ago.. and i cant help BUT worry that i will be held viable to luring a minor, even though i did the right thing by making sure nothing ever happened..
How does one deal with feeling remorse and guilt even though there should be no reason for it? :/
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