Sexual exploration or abuse

As children me and a close family friend one male one female, would explore each other's bodies through playing doctor. That's when we were younger, then it graduated to imitating sexual acts such as oral sex and grinding on one another with out bottoms down. Never led to penetration because we never developed the concept. This lasted into our early teens. Then we both moved on to real relationships. I've talked to this person about it a few times. They said their is no bad feelings towards me for it. I was older by two years so I feel responsible. They said I kinda pressured them at times but it wasn't a big deal or anything. Said we were just kids and to let it go no need to worry. Should I be able to let this go?

If that's how the conversation went then I think you should let it go. You didn't have ulterior motives and if it was just playing doctor then you can chalk it up to sexual exploration. I can understand if you still have negative feelings attached or guilt, but just continue with a clean conscience if you can.

Well in the beginning it was just playing doctor. Has we got older we took it farther by simulating sex acts but no actual sex penetration. But I talked to the other person a few times over the years and they don't ever think about it. Just said no need to worry just stupid kids.

I still wouldn't think too much about it. If they said there are no bad feelings and not to worry about it I'd really just listen to them. It really was a lack of judgement as kids and inability to grasp future consequences. If you want you can apologize again if that will help with the guilt but otherwise try to live your life in peace. I don't think anyone here will categorize it as abuse.

Yep definitely sounds like exploration - you were only a couple of years apart and it doesn't sound like it was whatsoever damaging. Don't worry bout it.