I touched my younger cousin

Alright this is really hard for me to say so please don't hate. About a year ago my 5 year old cousin and I (14 at the time) were at home when my mother left the house to go somewhere. My cousin called me into my sister's room where she was playing. I played with her and then she sat down and pulled down her pants and asked me to look at her vagina. At the time my hormones were going a bit insane as I wasn't active at kissing or anything with over a year, I kinda touched her vagina and then pulled up her pants as I felt bad. I never really thought about the experience until recently when I got very guilty affecting my schoolwork and sport. I REALLY don't want to tell my mother because it would kill me so somebody please just give me some morale support.

Hi

I am sorry you are feeling bad, sounds like thing are difficult for you. Hoever I have to say that I think you need to tell someone about this. What you did may have been damaging to your cousin and she might need some help with this. I do understand this would be very difficult for you to do but I think it is what needs to be done. I am sorry I cant be more reassuring as I do understand this is difficult for you but I think it is important for you to tell someone for the sake of your cousin.

That is my view on things

Cracked

Its actually good that you realise what you did is wrong.
And it is good you have reached out here to ask for some help..
It would have been hard to own up to doing wrong here but you did.. ...

If you can't find the courage to tell someone ..
Put some boundaries in place for yourself NOW with her !!

Do NOT be alone with her again in the bedroom or any where else where you might be tempted to try again ....
If you have to be alone --> find something for YOURSELF to do & keep busy !
If she ever does such a thing again --> tell her it is wrong & tell her to go away immediately !
I would actually tell her mother or yours ! that she is doing in -appropriate things in front of you ..
As she also needs to be stopped doing such a thing in front of older boys !
She is not at fault you are though..YOU should have immediately told her to pull them up & you should have been angry at her ..She does not need to be doing such things in front of anyone!

If she ever does it again to you ! walk out of the room & get an adult to deal with her !
I would also be wondering why she asked you to look in the first place ..
Think maybe you should tell your mum about what she is doing , as it is also wrong for her to be playing silly games like that !
She also needs to be stopped pulling down her pants in front of the wrong people..
You should feel bad yes for what you did..! But the good thing here is that YOU know you did bad!
So forgive yourself this time ONLY! Do not be alone with her again like that !

I think you should tell your mother, and I think you may be surprised with her reaction. I know I worried for a long time about telling my mom the things I felt guilty about. But once I did tell her, I felt so much better, and nothing changed between us. If your mom loves you unconditionally (as she should), it will be okay. That's not to say that her love needs to be unconditional in order for her to forgive you for this, because what you did was forgivable anyway. I feel very strongly about sexual assault, but this sounds to me like a heat of the moment mistake, and I certainly don't think you are a bad person or that you deserve to have your life ruined over this. Telling your mother and checking on your cousin is the responsible thing to do. Once that is done, I believe everything will be okay for both of you in the end.