Porn == cheating?

FrayedEndOfSanity wrote:Cheating? Heck, no.

However, some women do have insecurities about their appearance, so if the question comes up, make it absolutely clear that you think she's hot and desirable, that you're not holding her to the silicone standard of the porn industry, and that you like her just the way she is. Requests for changes in appearance should be made in this form: "I really like it when you wear _____." Or, "You look beautiful between your legs. Why not showcase it with a landing strip?"

Mmmeeeh... I think it depends greatly on the relationship and exactly what you and your partner agree on. For example, I felt terrible with my first girlfriend for looking at porn, it just, felt wrong given who she was and how I wanted to respect her wishes. My second girlfriend was a bit wild and was definitely frisky, so neither she nor I had any problems with porn and she even didn't mind the thought of threesomes etc. So I think it's relative to both yourself and your partner, but you need to come to an honest agreement on it.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go find my vibrator.

Wow...

Suuuure, take the easy way and only read my short post! I see how you are.

Just kidding with ya, by the way.

I basically agree on all of those cheating/not cheating definitions FrayedEndofSanity.
I personally like saying what I want to online, so I wouldn't want a bf to say I can't goof around online. Those aren't romantic relationships, the feeling isn't there on my part or the part of the person I'm talking to. It would be, however, one of those things I'd quit if a bf didn't like it.

shutin wrote:I basically agree on all of those cheating/not cheating definitions FrayedEndofSanity.
I personally like saying what I want to online, so I wouldn't want a bf to say I can't goof around online. Those aren't romantic relationships, the feeling isn't there on my part or the part of the person I'm talking to. It would be, however, one of those things I'd quit if a bf didn't like it.

This makes good sense. Like you, I used to enjoy the occasional online encounter. But my fiance doesn't like it, so I stopped. I didn't realize that this was an issue until I developed an online friendship with someone who shared my enjoyment of sex and racy literature. I didn't realize how far I'd taken it. Sure, it was just words on the screen, but there was a degree of emotional attachment. My fiance and I discussed it, and seeing how bad it made him feel made me stop on my own accord. *Slaps self on head.* By my own definition, I've cheated on my fiance online. We got over it rather quickly, though. A benefit of the whole thing was finally addressing some key issues.

At least now I know that little things, if left unchecked, can bloom into big things, and that I need to be mindful, and take things in moderation. Compromise was OK by me in this case. It's not like I was being asked to watch him get it on with a commercial sex worker, or to never have sex again. So, if I feel like I need time to myself, I keep it to racy art and the occasional skin flick.

So, I guess the general consensus is that the definition of cheating is part of what is acceptable in a relationship between two (or more!) consenting adults. It's specific to both the individuals and the relationship. Ooh, this reminds me to update the long post. I feel like I'm being closed-minded towards people who choose to live in groups. That's not for me, but I don't think I should exclude them.

FrayedEndOfSanity wrote:Suuuure, take the easy way and only read my short post! I see how you are.

Just kidding with ya, by the way.

Maybe we should hook up sometime.

Don't worry, I don't bite....... Unless you want me to.

Der Serienmörder wrote:

FrayedEndOfSanity wrote:Suuuure, take the easy way and only read my short post! I see how you are.

Just kidding with ya, by the way.

Maybe we should hook up sometime.

Don't worry, I don't bite....... Unless you want me to.

i c wat u did thar 2 lolz !

The way I see porn is nothing more than a substitute for the imagination. Either too bored to use your imagination for that masturbation session, or you're possibly looking for idea's. As for it being cheating, that's also subjective. Personally I don't think I'd find a partner sleeping with someone else upsetting. I'd merely ask them if their other partner did it better, and then try to learn to do that, or be better than it.

Do you masturbate all time ?! if yes u should talk with your girlfriend or see a psy !