Curious Thing...

Hello,

Ok, I'll try to keep it short. There's this girl I'm deeply in love with and she sorta knows that, at least I hope she does. Anyways, I don't want to bore you all with how difficult everything is, but there's one very interesting thing I want some opinions on. Really, I'm just curious.

She never looks me in the eyes. Well, she sometimes does, but just for a second. At first I thought it was just something I made up, but then I really started noticing that. The problem is, when she's talking to some other people, groupmates and whatever, just meaningless small-talk, she looks them in the eyes like everyone else. When I talk to her, she of course replies and everything, but rarely, if ever, looks me in the eyes, she's always sort of somewhere else, though the concentration is there and there's not a hint of annoyance in her voice. And I know that she doesn't really like some of the other people, but still, just when they're talking about nothing in particular, she looks them in the eyes. Now, the most logical explanation would be that she's lying or whatever, but I want to really emphasize that I don't really think it's as simple as that. I'm not saying she likes me or anything, that I don't know, but she definitely wouldn't do that out of simple dislike, because she acts normally with people I know she dislikes. And I'm not sure, of course, but I really think she's not shallow at all, so there's must be a deeper reason for that. I seem to be the only person she does that to, and even with totally random people she doesn't act that way, so surely it's not just because I'm a total idiot and she absolutely hates me?

It's just a funny thing really, but I'm totally unsure of what it might mean...

Any ideas?

P.S. Please no "you're just too ugly to look at" jokes

Cheers!

I always had thought that someone didn't make eye contact with you because they were shy. I suppose that with all of the other eye contact conversations that she has had this isn't the case with her. Perhaps because she knows you like her, and she may have a bit of aloofness with intimacy and all, she may be keeping you a little "at arms length" until she can trust you a bit more? Usually women love the fact that they can have strong feelings but too often this gets them to make wrong choices and they have to be more careful when choosing things that can hurt them. Most guys are "tougher" (so to speak), and can get over hurt feelings a lot faster than most women.
Also, maybe she is really trying to listen to what you say. I know, for me, I will get caught up in facial expression, and other visual cues, that I may miss what is being said and I need to really focus on the auditory part so that I don't miss any details of what the other person said. This is just me. Some of my thoughts.
Best wishes with your pursuit.

Just a thought... Maybe she likes you, and is shy around you because of her feelings? You said she probably know you like her, she may feel the same for you...

Like I said, just a thought.

well...I can't speak for her because I don't know her...but for me, eye contact is sometimes avoided when conversations get heated or way too serious for me...and I hate fighting so by averting my eyes I feel like I am deterring a conflict or judgement, because I could give a rats ass what a stranger thinks of me (or someone I don't like for that matter) but the people that really matter in my life---those are the ones that I don't want judging me (negatively) and what the hell I lost my train of thought


ok so that was supposed to help but I typed myself to the point of digression that um.....what?

ok I'll try again.... maybe maybe she is nervous. I do that. I have pretty strong social anxiety and looking at people (strangers) just encourages small talk. but you aren't strangers I guess, so...

maybe she is scared. maybe she has things (important things) she wants to say to you but she is terrified you would pass judgement on her, leaving her with the pain of never being able to trust you. trust is important and if she doesn't feel like she can fully trust you, she may not talk the real talk. why would she feel as if she can't trust you?--well, perhaps she sees the way you react to other things, or she has some preconcieved notion that you will not understand. she fears you may react badly to certain information and not consider understanding.

yeah, I have problems too hope this helps a bit.