Something is wrong with my girlfriend.

Im starting to think that my girlfriend is suffering from some kind of mental illness and im wondering if anybody has any advice on what it might be and how i could help her.

Some of the things i see that really concern me are

shes very disorganized with her emotions, and im not talking about the usuall stuff either, im talking about going from absolutely super clingy to very emotionally cold and distant.

shes has some kind of paranoia about her, her mother has the same type of paranoia too, its not exactly dellusional but more so just a overwhelming strech on something that could cause supsicion, but some of it isnt, some of it really is out there, for instance i was walking in the woods with her out behind her house and having a really good converstation when the horses made a noise, instantly i this look of total terror came over her face and she started dragging me out of there saying that somebody was after her and she was truely terrified, i had a light and kept trying to reassure her that there was nothing there and maintained calm but it didnt calm her down. and she isnt like that all the time it just pops up every now and then and having a little to much to drink helps bring it on

she thinks she has heart problems, which i think she really doesnt they are just anxiety/panic attacks, they are kinda related to the paranoia thing, she just flips out for a bit and then passes out for a little bit and calms down, i had the suspicion that it was just a typical "give me some attention" move but i dont really think so anymore.

she spends alot of time mad at something, she usually isnt ever mad at me but she is always got a complaint about something else in her life. and can go from relatively happy to upset about something for no apparent reason at the drop of a hat.

shes very smart but says some things that make absolutely no sense at all occasionally. I am also always getting the idea that she is sheilding me from some of the things going on in her mind i guess for fear that i wont see it through with her.

does anybody have any ideas how to get someone who is apparently somewhat paranoid to confide in you so you can try to help them cope with whatever is going on? Does anybody have an idea of if this is a mental condition or not? how do you convince somebody who thinks there is nothing wrong with themselves to seek professional advice?

I really do want to do anything i can for her, i just really dont know how.

How often have you talked to her about it? You should maybe have a talk with her about your concern next time you see something that concerns you, and assure her that you will be there for her always and through anything (if you think she is afraid). Is she apprehensive when it comes to seeing a professional? If so, maybe you can talk to a professional yourself and tell them your concerns about your girlfriend.

If she gets delusional and afraid from drinking, try to avoid situations where she comes in contact with liquor (if she gets the way you describe). Also try to see whether you can talk to her when she gets overly paranoid about what she is afraid and try to get to the root of the fear (this of course would be easier with a professional).

Until she thinks something is wrong with her - nothing is.

Just because you don't like how she acts, thinks, etc, and you say with her - that proves something is wrong with you.

You can't change her to be what you want - find someone is that is what you want already.

Excalibur wrote:Until she thinks something is wrong with her - nothing is.

Just because you don't like how she acts, thinks, etc, and you say with her - that proves something is wrong with you.

You can't change her to be what you want - find someone is that is what you want already.

you have got to be some miracle working psychologist/iatrist/therapist--you know so much (by reading your various posts I see a lot of sense in the words). Just had to get that out there. dr. phil...is that you? j/k

No, just been there done that.

You have to stand on both sides of it to get it completely.

If someone says they don't have a problem with their drinking, for example....and you do - then who has a "drinking problem?"

The person who's drinking and is fine with the amount they drink and the results of drinking.? No - that person doesn't have a drinking problem.

Or the person who doesn't like how much the person they run with drinks, hangs around anyway, and doesn't like the results of being around someone who drinks this much? The person hanging around the person that drinks has a drinking problem.