Dating a girl with D.I.D TRIGGER WARNING

I am making this post to try to get it out of my system, this relationship ended in 2019 I suspect they may have taken their life since then, but I do not want to trouble them if that is not the case.

I will refer to myself as T and them as M unless I am referring to one of their alternate identities.
I have autism the way it affects me is I can live in my head almost indefinitely; I do not crave music in my life and sometimes sarcasm goes over my head. Some things others might not find kosher I have no problem with and it is because of this I was working as a sex chat moderator in my early18s while being a moderator I went by *mod edit* and my primary job was to give out temporary bans on people who were being overly aggressive usually men. My theory is the internet had yet to really let in the chaos you see today, online predators really were not sophisticated or as common as they are now. It was on this chat site I met *mod edit* the username of the person I would fall for pretty hard. She said she wanted somebody to talk with and was feeling like she was in a dark place. So I sent her a DM and asked what was bothering her, I don't remember what all we talked about but we were up for 15 hours straight just talking, then we exchanged phone numbers and continued talking over the phone until my phone screen melted and I had to go buy a new one.

She did not appear to have any mental illness when I met her, she challenged me and made me think deeper into things we talked about books, and she loved that I liked to write children's stories. We would talk almost every night, then after a few months of talking and just enjoying each other's company. Her friend answered the phone and asked if I had talked to her recently and I said no, then after some time, her friend told me she found M unconscious on the floor with her arm broken over the stairway banister.

This was the beginning of the rollercoaster, it turned out. Her ex had done drugs and broke into her mom's place and raped her and broke her arm, I found out over time that he did this a lot he and his friends would bring over girls and prostitutes and get them high and gang bang them. Then C the ex would turn to M and threaten to break her fingers and tell her you can join in and take care of my friends, or I can burn your hand on the stove. M told me she would almost always pick the stove, and C would put her in a choke hold until she passed out and then would wake up with a bleeding arm or leg and have to clean out the sperm. She tried to talk to her mother, but her mother told her this is something she would need to get used to if she wanted to be taken care of by a real man.

Looking back, I should have severed ties with her should have encouraged her to go to a hospital or something, but I wanted to be the one to save her at the time, (looking back now I cringe at myself back then). I tried to get her to tell me where she lived so I could be there but she was petrified and refused, then I talked her int coming to visit me and this was the start of why I thought maybe I was being played .(again at the time you didn't see hardly any in detail dedicated catfish this would have been around 2010 2011. So, she and her friend started to allegedly drive from where she was to where I was Chicago to Cincinnati, and somebody had side swiped them just a few minutes outside Ohio so Instead of coming the rest of the way here they took a taxi all the way back home. This also marks the start of when M started to show more than 1 identity. The first alternate was 'Mel'(*mod edit) who was a 17-year-old who was knocked up by her dad but get this. In her mind I was her dad, and she was just non nonchalant about it. I gathered in a few hours of meeting 'Mel' that she was used to being used for sexual pleasure. At first if I did not want to talk to 'Mel', I could ask her to put her mom on the phone and more often than not she would put M on the phone, and I would discuss my discomfort. I do not think she was faking her disorder.
I later learned M's mother would often date men who were predators, and the men would sexually abuse M as early as 2 and when she went to her mother, her mother would blow it off or accuse her of trying to ruin a good thing.

I did not like what I heard about her mother, M had a grandpa and grandma who were more parents like to her and they actually cared a lot about her however her grandpa was in his 80s and her grandma didn't know who she was half of the time. As our relationship continued, I would tell her bedtime stories to get her to go to sleep, she started to refuse to eat and so I would bribe her with a story to get her to eat anything or to try to get her to pretend to sleep and eventually she would . We would have a lot of phone sex probably because we were both victims of varying types of abuse. It was a ways for us to sooth the pain.

The problem became when we would fall asleep on the phone and I would be asleep but continue telling a story while asleep, then her alternate 'Mel' would start talking and start talking about me being sexual with her and sometimes Id wake up to her masturbating to being touched by her dad and not wanting to wake up her mom. This made me uncomfortable at first but as time went on I started to play along with it because I rationalized well its still her she thinks she loves me this is another part of her that loves me.(later on I would regret this) So things went on like this until she was visiting her grandparents who had gotten her a dog named Kora who was trained to be an assisted living animal. Allegedly while out walking in the snow a car drove up behind her and hit her in the back of the head with a baseball bat, her dog had laid on top of her to keep her warm for 2 hours before anyone came to look for her. She ended up going to the hospital and the doctors said her brain tissue was spaghettified. She knew I was trustworthy but couldn't remember my name she called the night nurse mr pizza face and this was when another other first showed up.

She introduced me to 'Bel'(*mod edit) who might of been 'Mel's incest daughter or M's 2nd kid I'm not sure she was about 8 and immediately became a victim to 'Mel's bullying, she started hitting herself and inflicting self harm. 'Mel' would claim 'Bel' wanted to come between her and me, and then later started to claim she was going to put 'Bel' in her place by raping her. So I would get these phone calls at 2 am of what sounded like a child screaming in paid begging her dad to help her and make her stop, and she would change her voices and everything, then right as her self inflicted punishment came to a climax she would snap back to M and M would have no recollection as to how she ended up where she was .

At about this point I was feeling completely overwhelmed with just everything, but I was determined not to give up on her I believed I encountered M for a divine reason. Like God had put her in my way and I was obligated to help her. So I continued to tell her bed time stories and played as referee between her others. I had started working with foster kids and I couldn't be on the phone as often. However, the stress from dealing with unstable kids at work and having what I believed was a very much insane girlfriend waiting for me when I was off work began to take its toll on me. I became short tempered, I wasn't sleeping, I was frequently afraid I would get the call saying she had died. M wasn't eating and had continually tried to kill herself over things like I didn't feel like making up a story that night and I wanted to sleep so she would threaten to off herself, or after her attack they found out who was responsible and as the trial neared, she wanted to kill herself so he couldn't get to her again. I had to beg her not to just to stay with me and then take her mind off whatever she was thinking by making up a story. At one point she had lost so much weight she was down to 75 pounds and her friend said she looked like a walking skeleton, I had talked with her friend a few separate times and is the reason I think she might have been playing with my head or something her friend sounded just like her and her excuse was that she grew up with her, like they used to share diapers. Eventually it was found out her best friend's boyfriend was tipping off M's ex as to when she would be home alone and then that was when they were trying to kill her so she couldn't testify at trial. She was attacked at least 4 or 5 more times. Or I would be on the phone with her, and I would beg her to call the police and the police would tell her they will be about 45 minutes because they are too busy.
anyway her other personalities would frequently be having sex together and try to contact me at 3 am when I was asleep and, it wasn't like I could confide this to anybody like how do I begin to explain my long distance relationship girlfriend who I haven't met in person has multiple children in her head who rape fight each other for my attention and the right to get a bed time story from me?

This relationship destroyed my desire to be a writer, I had a passion for writing and M killed it for me forever, We started to argue and I told her I feel like a orange you squeeze juice from and instead of getting another orange you keep using the same half of orange to squeeze juice until its just mush in your hand and you keep using it again and again and then you insult it when it doesn't produce more juice or it taste bad and you burn down a orchard.

So her attacker got 30 years to life but I was never able to look anything up and she claimed her best friend paid off reporters to not report on it, To keep her identity secret I was too wound up in her insanity to look into it further. after the trial I thought that things would start being more positive.....nope it was like the anticipation of the trial was the only thing holding her together and she just started to collapse mentally and physically, she got 2 more dogs another Australian husky and a pit bull, and she got a body guard who she described as looking like vin diesel, who we will call G so immediate I understood M was attracted to G and 'Mel' would try to perform oral sex on G when he was napping and at first he would resist or lock himself in a room but men can only refuse so many times before a woman gets their d in her mouth while they are asleep and that's what happened, however it was 'Bel' who I guess was the first to be successful and 'Mel' wasn't having it, so from what she described to me, 'Mel' stripped 'Bel' down and put PeanutButter on 'Bel's butt and had the pit bull rape 'Bel' s she would know her place. Later on G talked to me and told me he found her getting drug down the hall way by her own dog with his penis stuck inside of her.

I had decided at this point we were not a couple I was just obligated to be there for her and make sure she didn't off herself, We tried taking a break from each other and we were both unhealthily attached like heavy hard core trauma bonded so I would tell her bed time stories she would tell me about how 'Mel' beat up bell and fit a new dildo inside of her (mind you this is all the same person) At the same time I cant talk to coworkers or clients about any of this or family so I would have to lie and just tell people I'm fighting with my gf or my gf and I are having problems, trying my best to remain professional at work with foster kids who had been through worse than the girl I had been on the phone with for about 4 years at this point, I would be at work on break and get a phone call from M describing what her dogs penis taste like and how she is starting to prefer it to how mine taste(again never met her in person)

I started dating other people, but I guess my expectations were permanently skewed and I developed a curse of sorts where I was only attracting unstable crazy girls and I would tell M about them which she found funny hearing about the shenanigans. So we were still friendly and I kind of learned to block out the insane aspects of our friendship she would casually tell me about getting fd by dog or almost hanging herself in a sex swing because 'Mel' wanted to try the new dragon dildo on 'Bel' but its all in 1 person's head so she ended up lynching herself.

I started to develop nervous ticks like pulling out my own hair or waking up multiple times at night because I had been trained to wake up to her phone calls. She ended up dating her bodyguard G and I didn't have claim on her, I continued working with kids trying to get them adopted and try to patch up the little part of society I worked in and eventually I just told her we were not good for each other, Shes not moving on while talking to me she is leaving her wounds open and I am waiting for her to catch up when Shes on a completely different path in life.

in 2019 we said our last goodbye and she blocked me and for about 2 years I tried to go back on what I said tried to reach out to her so did other mutual friends but eventually we all gave up. I don't know if this will make it past the censors, but this person changed my life even though I never met them in person and I have never heard of another story quite like ours. it Honestly feels good just to say it all out loud. I have received a few phone calls at random from a childlike voice calling me dad but usually I was asleep and when I tried to call back the line was no longer in service. I haven't received any additional calls since 2020, I think I prefer it that way.

I am letting this post into forum with a trigger warning and mostly because you mentioned it felt good to get off your chest. But I’m locking it because I think further interaction is unnecessary at this point and may further complicate things.