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Is it worth continuing the relationship?

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Is it worth continuing the relationship?

Postby lonrem » Sun Nov 13, 2022 3:56 pm

Dating a girl for 3 months. The problem is that we very rarely see each other because of work, the schedules do not match, and I am the initiator of any of our meetings, and she doesn’t seem to care at all that we don’t see each other, she says, "Well, it’s okay, see you next time. And constantly when we make an appointment, something happens, for example, today, we were supposed to see each other in the evening, but she allegedly feels unwell, her stomach twists and something else. Everything would be fine, but when our schedules coincide, for some reason she can devote the whole day to her friend, and the other day in the evening spend with me only about 4 hours. We correspond most of the time, and see each other 2 times a week, but this week we didn’t see each other at all, is this normal? She tells me that this is how the circumstances develop, but why can I move my plans for her sake, but she cannot? I love her very much, I give gifts, I constantly ask how things are, if my help is needed, but for some reason I get composure in response.
Is it really worth it to continue this relationship? I tried to talk to her about more frequent meetings, in response I hear that "I have enough and so much, I do not have time to get bored".
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Re: Is it worth continuing the relationship?

Postby Otter » Tue Nov 15, 2022 8:27 am

Relationships are all about being together, especially in the beginning. However, later down the road, when two people commit to having a family then things usually become more difficult, regarding spending time together.

Sometimes being in love can cloud our thoughts. In those times it's best to step back and ask yourself some fundamental questions and take practical action.

For instance, you need to establish what your needs are. What is acceptable for you regarding spending time together? Three days a week? Weekends only, etc. Then you need to talk with her and ask her what her needs are. You'll find out quickly if you are compatible in that way and if you are willing to make sacrifices.

Frankly, during her free time, if she doesn't seem to want to spend much time with you, that is a sign she is not enthusiastic about the relationship. At the third month of dating, a healthy relationship should be picking up speed.

Reciprocity, give and take, quid pro quo, however, you want to put it, a healthy romantic relationship is based on a mutual love for each other, which means equal affection and respect.

Good luck.
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Re: Is it worth continuing the relationship?

Postby Oyliti » Wed Nov 16, 2022 2:39 am

I also think that a healthy relationship should be building up steam by the third month of dating.
It is a wise decision to determine your needs. Try to open up to them about your feelings and opinions. This is probably how she used to be in relationships. Not only ask yourself, but also her, what is appropriate for you in terms of spending time together.
I believe that, especially in the beginning, relationships are all about being together. However, when two people decide to start a family, things normally get more challenging in terms of spending time together.
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