Starting to feel bitter towards women

We all have real limits: full-time jobs, family obligations, and yes, some of us have disabilities or mental disorders as well, yet many of us make the time to choose some kind of happiness. Be it a hobby or an interest, being a member of a club or a church choir or a baseball team, or simply being around ppl whose company we enjoy, for examples. I understand that those with Aspergers have problems in social situations, but that doesn't make them incapable of relating in some way with others.

You surely have talents or interests or a curiosity about certain subjects that you can share with the world.

I do have interests but I struggle to maintain them due to depression or social pressures discouraging me.

People tell me to work on myself or to just remain positive. But how long will it be until doing so pays off? I feel like I am suffering from a heart attack but I can't get any treatment.

Do you have any health insurance, either thru your employer or state program?

Do you have any relatives who could help pay for a doctor's visit so that you get an eval for depression and treatment for it?

Can you do a temp moonlight job so that you can afford to see a doctor or get treatment for your depression?

"People tell me to work on myself or to just remain positive. But how long will it be until doing so pays off?"

Lol, I don't think there's such a thing as a time limit on a payoff from being positive or working on yourself. That's kind of a lifelong thing and payoff can come in surprising ways you'd never expect.

Any more excuses?

there's no magic formula. you can't just flip a switch and transform your life overnight. but you can decide to 'accentuate the positive and eliminate the negative'. i'm going to indulge myself in a very old joke here ...

a man is in a park walking his dog when another man runs towards him chasing his hat, which is being blown by the wind. the dog grabs the hat in his mouth. the man chasing his hat, seeing this, says to the man with the dog: i don't like your attitude. to which the man with the dog retorts: it's your 'at 'e chewed.

... and it is indeed your attitude.

I have health insurance and I actually have an appointment scheduled to see a therapist but I can't see the therapist until the 18th.

I just wonder what I am supposed to do until then. My usual day is getting up, going to work, and trying to pass the time before I go to bed. I get told not to look for friendships because it will make me look desperate but I see people engaging in social activities all the time.

I am constantly worrying that there is a cut off age to romance and if missing out on the psychological moratorium has doomed me.

and worrying is obviously helping you, isn't it!

candidly, i can't see me having a romantic relationship anymore. my last attempt completely blew my fuses. and i'm just getting too old now. not what i might have wanted but c'est la vie. if there's a silver lining to this particular cloud, i've yet to find it ... but this isn't the only cloud in my life!!!

BTW: a little self-deprecating humour is a great antidote to taking yourself too seriously.

But can you really blame me for worrying? I've read more failure stories than success stories of male aspies when it comes to dating and romance.

Markness wrote:But can you really blame me for worrying?

... err ... yes. who else am i going to blame? cupid!

Markness wrote:I've read more failure stories than success stories of male aspies when it comes to dating and romance.

... that's as may be. and i don't doubt that they're true. and perhaps you'll never have a romantic relationship. however, worrying about this isn't going to do anything for you. if anything, it'll just make you less attractive to women. what kind of woman wants a relationship with a man that's an emotional wreckage? quite probably none!

now, aspies are most excellent at obsessions. forget about women. go and get yourself an obsession. and maybe, just maybe, one will happen along in the fullness of time anyway.

I break the stereotype of aspies having exceptional talents in their areas of interest. I can't seem to excel at anything I am interested in. I can practice a song on my guitar like crazy but keep flubbing at it no matter how hard I try. It's like my neural pathways just hit dead ends.

If I forget about having a girlfriend, it would mean all those who hurt me will have won.

"If I forget about having a girlfriend, it would mean all those who hurt me will have won."

O lordy, so now you're gonna let all those turkeys who have hurt you win.

Sheez, I don't know what else to say, but isn't that another excuse? How many more? I'm done here.