Obsession

Hi everyone, I'm not exactly new to this site, as I've been coming here for a while and have posted twice (in the paraphilias forum). However I thought my issue would be better suited here. If there is a more-suitable forum for me to go to just let me know.

ANYWAYS

If any of you have perhaps read my previous posts you would know that I'm an 18 y/o male who has become infatuated with a 7th grader. Except it's surpassed infatuation and has reached obsession levels, I do believe. Not a minute goes by that I don't think about her. I don't think about having sexual relations with her, I would never lay a finger upon her. No, I fantasize about dating her, the conversations we'd have, dancing with her at school dances, taking long walks at sunset while holding hands, etc. I have only told two people about this (besides everyone at the paraphilias forum) and they have been accepting of it. I just hate to be obsessed with her, yet I feel so euphoric when I see her. At one point I couldn't sleep at night because I couldn't stop thinking about her. I was averaging about one and a half hours of sleep a night. I used to turn into a mumbling fool whenever I was within a 10 ft radius of her, but I've recently managed to remain calm whenever in her presence. I'm always stealing glances at her whenever I get the opportunity. I can't help it, she's just so pretty.
I suppose I'm not asking you anything, it just feels good to vent about this a little. I just thought I'd find a more appropriate forum to vent in.

You did a nice job by venting it out. I also faced the same situation in my teens, there was a girl in my class with whom I was obsessed but barely could muster courage to have a real conversation with her. Just a greeting or a two couple of times. Complete year went by and I stayed obsessed and like you I was worried about my obsession. Then after I completely lost touch with her for 2 years and then we met again in a class, I found, though I liked immensely, my obsession had disappeared.

At the end of the year, I mustered courage to vent out my feelings before her, though she said no but treated me well even offered my sweets and tea! Though I was rejected, but I felt great that I finally said it.

It's starting to get worse, I think. It's starting to feel like I can't go an hour without seeing her face. It's starting to have a negative effect on my schoolwork. I keep making excuses to go out into the hall just on the off-chance she might be there. I can't focus in class because I can't get her off of my mind. Last schoolyear I was getting all 90s, but this year I've been barely scraping by with grades in the low 70s. A few teachers have already asked why my grades are slipping, and I can't tell them for fear that they might misunderstand. So my responses to them are the typical teenage "I dunno".

Again, this is just me venting after a stressful day. It just feels really good to post my problems on a site where I won't get yelled at for it. Thanks for reading.

You have to own your failings and ground yourself in reality. You are clearly far too obsessed to make this healthy anyway. I hope you can find something else to focus on.

I hope so too.