22 years old and never been in a relationship

JustHelpful wrote:I think you can pay and that's fine, but only as long as you are actively trying to improve socially. It becomes a problem when you pay for it as a substitute for continuing to develop your own skills. In that case paying (assuming its legal) is still to your detriment.

Yes I'm surely always trying to improve socially, and I can say the progress so far is very appealing.

However, I still can't ignore my needs, so paying doesn't seem like a very bad idea at least temporarily.

Thanks a lot to everyone.

If it helps, I never had any boyfriend or did anything love-related until I was 24 years old (27 now). I'm a girl and I look fairly well. Just know... you are not the only one in this
And there are a lot of short girls that you will appear very tall to!

Ameer27 wrote:I'm thinking since all guys can get this normally and i just don't know how, I'm thinking to go and pay again, that might be the solution, because it's a need I have like other people.

There's no shame in paying for sex, just the expense and it does give you an opportunity to experience what it is like and develop some sexual confidence so that you aren't fumbling around (as much) when you do meet a partner. I think it is great that you had the confidence to get your needs met: it's quite daunting to take that step. Whilst I know it isn't the same thing as initiating a sexual relationship with another person, it does bear a remote resemblance in that it is asking for and actioning what you want in a way that is not harming someone else and being able to do that is the beginning of confidence IMO.

Not all guys can get sex normally all the time (it just seems like it): many have to get drunk in a bar with a girl for the alcohol to reduce inhibitions and even then they might end up going home alone. If all guys managed to get sex "normally", prostitution wouldn't be so widespread. In certain cultures, Fathers used to take their sons to prostitutes for an initial sexual experience and I find it kind of sad that this is not more widespread: Father's taking an interest in their offsprings development in all areas of life. I think that first sexual experience is the most difficult and stressful and can be assisted by removing some of the stresses, making it a more beneficial experience.

Now you have experienced what sex feels like as compared to masturbation, in terms of getting "needs" met, you have a better idea of whether it is worth obsessing over. I think in society, we perhaps encourage a fantasy idea of sex in the inexperienced (as the be-all-end-all of existence which it is not, merely a part), which results in stress: masturbation is good, sex with a partner can be better and loving sex with a partner potentially brings even more to the table, however we won't die without the latter two.

Maybe you will feel more relaxed about finding a relationship, now that you are no longer a virgin and can permit it to start more simply through a non-demanding friendship.

Thank you anti_matter_boy, that was really encouraging. Actually it was my father who encouraged me to do it, hehe.

Well, every now and then I'll still be annoyed by the fact that I've never been in a relationship, but at least I do know that I'm making progress really quickly, and I think day by day I'm becoming more ready to start approaching girls and actually opening up.

In all honesty, and I don't want to lie to myself anymore, it's not that I've never been in a relationship that annoyes me, it's peer pressure, an excessive amount of it. And honestly I know some people who get attention merely because of their looks, and I can clearly see that (not only me). I don't understand why some people can't really look past looks. This kinda puts even more pressure on me. I know that I'm not the best looking person, but at least I believe I have other good traits (according to my friends, hehe). Sorry if I sounded a bit arrogant...

Oh, and Give_Me_Cake that helps, because it reminds me I'm not alone.

Dear Ameer27,

22 years is a young age.You have plenty of time to find some one to share your life with. Just don't be too eager or else the consequences might not be what you wished for. Abiding to peer pressure is never advisable.

I know how you feel and I know that it can get uncomfortable but just live on. Don't concentrate on what you don't have. Wanting more than you should receive is greed and it is always harmful. Maybe you couldn't even have a relationship right now, even though you badly wanted one. Perhaps you need to be more mature.

Any way, in the meant time, listen to some good music.

You don't have to rush things out, you might end up picking up the wrong one. Justtake your time to date and to know more the guy. I had my first bf at age 24 and I wa in a hurry. I ended up suicidal coz he called ur engagement quits after 3 years of being with me. I thouht if only I took time to know more this person I could have saved myself from the heartache.