Can anyone offer advice re boyfriend and best friend

Hi there

I wonder if anyone can offer me some advice as im feeling a little bit lost. I am a bpd sufferer but i dont feel this is directly relevant to my condition...

I have recently met a man who i have fallen in love with. He feels the same and we have entered into a relationship. Im so happy with him and love spending time with him.

Last week we invited his friend and girlfriend over for a few drinks and allowed them to stay in my spare room. They had sex in my spare room and I was really uncomfortable with it and my boyfriend and I were having to listen to this and felt awkward. The next morning my boyfriend challenged his friend and told him it was disrespectful. I confided in my best friend about it aswell and she went crazy. She started shouting at me telling me my boyfriend is awful and totally disrespects me by bringing his friends up to mine. my best friend then phoned her boyfriend in front of me and told him what happened and said that my boyfriends actions made her appreciate her boyfriend so much more and kept going on and on about it, I began to cry and my best friend just called up her boyfriend again and said how much she loved him and how bad it was that my boyfriend let his friends do that in my house

I dont understand why she behaved like this....she kept saying no one treats my best friend like that but then phones her boyfriend and her daughter and made me feel terrible. I dont know where to go from here. I spoke to my boyfriend and he had already told his friends that they owe me an apology. I told my best friend this and she said she was still unamused. My boyfriend and I are really happy and he says not to tell my best friend any of my business from now on....can anyone offer me any explanation to why she reacted this way? thank you so much x

I admit it's pretty rude when women gossip about you, especially when it's done right in front of your face. I've had it happen to me several times, so I know instinctively what type of behavior you're talking about.

I have memories going back to my childhood of my very own mother literally going out of her way to spread personal information and rumors about me and basically insulting me right to my face. Then when I'd get upset with her or start treating her with suspicion, she wouldn't understand why I would do that. Typically I just write it off as a non-understanding of proper social etiquette and how to be respectful of others.