Help getting g/f to get into therapy.

Hey All-

My girlfriend is experiencing rts, in the reorganization stage. She needs therapy badly, but abjectly refuses to talk with anyone about it except me about it. Im no shrink and dont know what elae i can do to help. Not only is this destroying our relationship, but destroying me to the point where I have checked myself into therapy to process it all. I refuse to be that asshole guy who dumps his gf because she was raped, but this is the emotionally exhausting thing I've ever experienced in my life.

I need help to help her get the help that she needs. Any adivice is greatly appreciated.

45 views and no advice?

I'm thinking about setting her up, and tell her she doesn't have to say anything and have the shrink just talk to her for an hour about rts, therapy, and stuff like that.

Thoughts?

I, personally, am not eligible to give you a reply. I, myself, am one of those girls who also refuses to see a therapist or anything like that, which also gives my boyfriend a lot of headaches I'm not sure if I was raped (violated, yes; raped, unsure. my brother didn't go all the way so I don't really know), but to offer my opinion, it seems that she (like me), is afraid of opening up this sort of shameful things to some stranger. Having someone talk about you about rts and things like that is akin to admitting that she had been raped. Which I don't think she wants to. Compared to talking with someone she doesn't know, she'd rather confide in you, someone whom she loves and trusts. I know it's problematic, but I'm just telling you how she probably feels. About your breaking relationship, I don't know anything about that, but from what I see she feels like she can really confide in you. She trusts you. I'm not saying that she doesn't need therapy, just that it's hard to open up to people and admit hat something like that happened to you. I, too, think I need therapy, but the thought of facing a stranger that knows your deepest most shameful secret is a very scary process.

Perhaps try to persuade her slowly, maybe following her into the room too. It'll give her a small sense of security that you are there to support her, and that she isn't alone. Just a suggestion only, I'm not sure it'll work but try not to let your relationship break down, okay. She's at her weakest and most vulnerable moment and desperately needs you.

Sorry for the late reply, but I just joined the site today. I am in a relationship with a woman who was sexually abused as a VERY young child and then as a teenager in a several sexually and physically abusive relationship. None of this came out until about six months into our relationship. Much like you she initially only wanted to talk to me, which is extremely hard to process especially when your obviously not a licensed professional. Id like to say that she willing sought out help, but unfortunately it took us getting into a fight where I broke downe and said that I couldn't continue the relationship unless she helped herself.I let her know I support her a hindered percent, but that this wasn't a healthy relationship, she had been lashing out me a lot. She is now going to therapy and on lexapro to help with her ptsd, anxiety, and depression. Things are going better, but its still a journey and one that you have to be willing to take. I have been through a lot in my live and am no stranger to hard work both physically and mentally, but this has been a battle. If you love her its more than worth it, just let her know that you support and love her, shes God damn beautiful, its not her fault, and once again you'll always be in her corner, but she needs to be as well.