Permission to be on this forum

Hi,

Many people find themselves in situations that are painful and hard to get through.

I was raped. The only catch? I'm male!

The reason why I registered on this forum is, though we are rare, I would like to ventilate my feelings about the the matter and help in anyway. My goal.

This should stop!

I have a story to tell and I wish other males would be able to benefit by this forum. Singling out males for their own place would work, but I think that sensative guys who go through this might have a perspective that could help all of this.

We are all victums.

Resume:

B.S. in biology (shy away from Environmental Science)
Jobs...I worked in a psychiatric hospital as a CNA and helped dozens of women with these issues.

I have problems with friends who are male and seem to get along with women easier though I am heteralsexual.

Helping anyone...even tiny steps...would help me gain self worth.

I agree to the terms of this forum full heartedly and feel any other male should...which means if, I am not what I seem...I should be kicked out. I would do it!

I look forward to your answer!

Sparrowhawk, you do not have to ask permission to post in a forum.

This site is for anyone and everyone that is dealing with something whether it is abuse, anxiety, depression, schizphrenia etc.

male or female u are stil a rape victim...and so have every right to be on this board.welcome and hope this site helps.and may i commend you on your bravery.x

Rape is rape!!! Of course you are more than welcome to share your experiences.
Kathy

I know this is late coming but...

My husband narrowly escaped rape in his late teens. He had some "buddies" who lived int he apartment directly above his. They were dealing pot and were never unhappy to share with him. He didnt think much of that. He and his good friend at the time were always being given a little here and there. Then one day, he went up there and the guys stated to talk about how he was giong to repay them. He looked over and his good friend was sitting on the couch crying. He had been going through whatever the payment was for awhile. At this point he started to freak out a little. Then a couple guys pulled him down and started to take off his pants. Luck and God were on his side. Right at that moment someone knocked at the door. He took his chance and got the heck out fo their, buckling his belt on the way down the hallway. Back "safe" in his apartment, he listened below a vent and heard them discussing how they were going to get him. They were going to do much more than just rape him the next time. They planned to beat him and leave him for dead somewhere. He packed up and moved out to live with an older sister the same day.

Now my husband is a HUGE guy. You wouldnt think a 6 ft 3, all muscle of a guy, whos mere presence in a room makes most men quiver, would even be in a situation like this. It does happen.

He also makes friends with woman easier. He has had one good guy friend all the the time I have known him, but has matured past him. (He had started a family, the firend has not yet.) So he doesnt have any guy he calls a true friend. His boss is the closest thing but cant help but keep his guard up around him as well. A room full of guys, and he bails. No matter how long he has know them. Which is pretty much not nesassary as other men do NOT wish to get him on his bad side, just based on his size.

Woman just love him. Not usually in a romantic way but when his boss gets to picking on him (joking about his slightly balding spot, whatever) he need not say anything back because all the woman start defending him. He has a hard time when men start to talk bad about woman. He sticks up for them, and the guys dont like that. Many had suggested that he was gay in the past as many yrs went by for him without a girlfriend. Then that ended 5 yrs ago

This was the hardest thing for him to ever tell me. Nobody else knows. I had been raped 5 months before we met. I thought I had told him early on, but when making a comment one day a year into our relationship, he was shocked and upset that I hadnt told him. I guess it had been a little fresh back then. Anyway, he did a little searching within himself and told me that he was not angry, that he understood exactly why I hadnt said anything. Then he took all the strength he had to tell me what happened to him. He even said that I could leave him if I wanted to and he understood if I thought less of him. I was like "How the hell is this your fault? Why would this make me want to leave you?" I think that men feel that they should be able to handle this over women but I think it is much harder as it is much harder for them to talk about it or seak help for it.

Thanks Becky..for giving life to my thread (Sparrowhawk!)...changed names...Oops In someways your post mirrors mine...in ways...never letting the importance of it being overshadowed...I hope? If not...I'll comment?

Alright!

Way back in 1980, I was raped/assaulted by a college professor!


I was brought up as a "nice guy" with no experience with anything in the world. Sex was never subject!

While my Mother had coffee, I found out I was the ideal boy on the block. MY best friends mother hated her kid and wanted him to be like me...so, he ditched me all the time! Friends were found and forgiven, until they forsaken the friendship...just to go back and be friends, again! I just forgave!

Interestly enough, as a baby boomer kid in the late times, we had at least twenty kids, all four years apart. No one would play with anyone who was not there age.

This was "T" street intersection! All of us were in this place!

The only one I could count on was someone my Mother hated. A young lady who was a year older than me. I had known her since I was three!

She was a blacksheep, for she put her finger up her nose! Did I care?

No!

This carmel colored waist length long haired girl was always there for me when I was picked last and made fun of? She was there for me! We climbed trees and got into mischief!

But, did my parents talk about sex..No!

When I became attracted to girls, I dreamt of the ones I would like! I was too scared to ask for a date...Even in college!

When I was in college I knew a guy..a professor...DR A. He was very well connected within the college community.

One day, at his home...unexpected, he wrestled and caught me in a hold and put his hands down my pants and started to find the vital parts. He found more satisfaction than I, for I was scared by his testerone hold that almost sufficated me, and, I felt that I would die! It was the longest time in my entire life.

I hope no goes through that!

When he finished, I spoke up. "What in the hell do you think you were doing?"

His excuses rambled on!

Yet, He was a vital part of grades for me. Luckily, he didn't take it personal and graded me according to everone else.

No one believed me. MY room mate and friends...not even my parents! I was alone...and have been alone!

Was I assaulted or raped?

Whats the difference?

I see young women and men get raped all the time! I read it on site!

I would love to put a stop to that..but, it is out of my control?

What I look for is the person who went through it. For if I can help a women or a man...I would? For everytime I do anything, it can help me! I guess!

I have a daughter 13 years and hardly any time with her for political reasons...people no peopl...who know people!

10 year marriage down the drain! I learned a few things. She never thought she could have "long" hair. She would imagine it! I told her...try it out!

Yes...you bet..I was the one who went to the beauty supply! That's fun! I tell them what I want and they are watching as I look at the labels to find the organic chemicals that were perfectly right!

(She still has long hair)..not a prerwquosite for love...but...always looking?

More imortant is how are you doing...?

That is why I am here. OCD...Anxiety...depression...rape...so! What else is new with everyone who is "normal"? Lael me all you want. Yo go to Psychiatrist and you read your chart?

Need I say more?

There is no such thing as normal! Just the [plain fact you exist and you care.

That's me!

A nut shell

Phil

(Thank's Becky for finding this to put it down?) Don't get over excited...it was bound to happen...sometime..with you!

OOPS

Now that you've brought up the subject........ There are a lot of my friends confess to me of some form of abuse or rape. Even my Dad! It's a lot more common than people would like to believe!