Remembering an assault years later

Hi all, I just wanted to get something off my chest. All the coverage in the news recently about sexual assault in hollywood has made me realise something that happened to me when I was at school. I never considered the fact that I was raped and even now, I'm still not sure. It's all very muddy (this was nearly 8 years ago) but what I do remember is that I had consensual sex with a guy when I was very drunk at a party. I know that I got sick and ended up in his bed once everyone else had left. I woke up at various points due to him touching me. I know I pushed him off but the next thing I remember is waking up in the morning and my tights and underwear were on the floor. I'm sure that I put these back on after we first had sex. Whether he had sex with me a second time whilst I was passed out, I don't think i'll never know for sure. I want to think he didn't but my gut tells me something happened. I guess i'm wondering if it is just me piecing things together without the full picture. I've never told anyone about this, you just always assume it's your fault for putting yourself in that situation. I was still very much a kid at the time and I still went to school with him for months after. I never said a word because I didn't think there was anything to say. It's not until now that I've really considered what happened. I just hope that if it did happen, he never does it (or did it) to anyone else that might be more vulnerable. That's what bothers me most. Thanks for reading if you got this far.

Jelena, sorry this happened to you. It sounds like a case of presumed consent. You had consented earlier so he presumed your consent continued after you were unconscious. If he undressed you again, he probably did at least try something with you..

Obviously that's wrong. The rule should be that an unconscious person is incapable of consent, regardless of what happened beforehand. If the person loses consciousness, you stop.

I too hope he hasn't done that to anyone else, and am sorry again that he did it to you. I think you're looking at this correctly and have a good & rational perspective of it. I'm glad you understand things so well.