Was this sexual assault? Help

I was in the 10th grade at the time, my then boyfriend and I were getting a ride back to his house with our friend to study, but about halfway there he unzipped his pants and pulled his penis out. I remember being like, "no we're in the backseat of our friend's car I don't wanna do that" but he was insisting I go down on him and I tried telling him no again but I didn't know what to do, I didn't wanna make a big deal out of it and risk our friend seeing and getting upset, and I didn't wanna make my boyfriend mad. But I remember leaning down hesitantly and then him pulling my head down. It didn't last for long, I pulled my head back because I didn't wanna keep doing it.

I never really put much thought into this until now, but I'm not sure since I gave in. It's bothering me so I just wanna get someone else's input.

So first thing, his actions were not appropriate or respectful towards you. If a person displays their genitals in a public situation and asks for sex, that is a pretty selfish thing to do, as it forces you to choose between them and your own need to control what happens to you, how others perceive you, and what your own behavior will be. His behavior was totally over the line.

Another issue is his not accepting your answer of no, which he should have done without question. Again that was disrespectful and inappropriate.

Then as to whether it was an assault, that depends on the dynamics of the situation, and you would know best what those were. If he held your head down and made you do it, then that's clearly an assault. If you did it voluntarily in response to his request, then it wouldn't be, although making the request in that situation was still very much out of line in the first place.

It sounds like it may have been somewhere in between, you were reluctant but complied anyway. Only you could truly say what your experience was, and whether you feel that an assault occurred.

Hope that helps. Given your age at the time, younger people can be more susceptible to peer pressure. As you mentioned, a big part of your process then was what other people would think if you refused or caused a scene, which was what you actually wanted to do. I'm sure your reaction to a similar situation today would be very different, you are older, much wiser, and much more confident. You'd be far more likely now to make & enforce your own decision.