Was i really raped?

Okay, so I will start off by saying this was years back and I never really delt with it. I was under 18 and the guy was 18-19 and yes i know that in its self is rape but thats not what im asking so please dont say that it was because of that. Okay, so i had met up with this guy and the plan was actually to go have sex but once we got there i didn't want to anymore. So we had started but he wasnt inside of me yet and i started to say no and move around and try to get up but he then put his hand around my neck and held me down and said "i love you alot you're going to feel this before we leave" and then he put himself inside of me with me still freaking out a little bit and he was like "calm down its just the tip im not even all the way in you" and i didn't physically fight back at that point.. it kept going for a bit some other things happened and then we kinda left. Anyway judging from what i told you..was that rape or am I just crazy. I have been wondering all these years but brushing it off like nahhh couldn't have been but in a way i know the truth but i need a safe place to get a 2nd opinion..

That was definitely rape.. yes - and I'm so sorry that happened to you

It doesn't matter how far through you are, if someone doesn't stop when you ask them to, it's turned into rape.. and there's absolutely no question of this being actually consensual.

I know what you mean though about brushing it off and trying to pretend to yourself it didn't happen.. I did the exact same thing when my friends brother sexually assaulted me..
Sometimes when everything is too fresh, it's easier to cope if you lie to yourself xx

seabreezeblue wrote:That was definitely rape.. yes - and I'm so sorry that happened to you

It doesn't matter how far through you are, if someone doesn't stop when you ask them to, it's turned into rape.. and there's absolutely no question of this being actually consensual.

I know what you mean though about brushing it off and trying to pretend to yourself it didn't happen.. I did the exact same thing when my friends brother sexually assaulted me..
Sometimes when everything is too fresh, it's easier to cope if you lie to yourself xx

Yeah its hard to comprehend it. I have a lot of issues with emotion and stability that I didn't used to have when I was a before that. Kinda wondering if that's what caused it. I don't know...Im so sorry that you had that happen to you as well.

I really appreciate that thank-you <3

I've had a lot of problems with emotions and stability since I was hurt (not by the one I mentioned, another one)..
I'm getting there i think.. do you think you'd like to try a little bit of counselling for this at all? Lots of people can find it really helpful..
I've not had a lot of contact with psychs, but i did find it helped a lot when i did xx