Rape & racism...?

In high school I was raped by a black, male 'friend' of mine, and now I've been feeling like I can no longer be sexually attracted to black men? I am romantically interested in a black man at the moment but am scared that if we get intimate I might freak out. I don't have PTSD, & I have never (beyond the first year) had issues with sex before. Does anyone have any similar experiences? Am I racist??

I am so sorry you went through that. No, you're not racist. It's normal to feel like you do about "anyone" who might have raped you. I don't have any similar experiences but perhaps others here might.

I agree with QG.. definitely doesn't make you racist.

Although you don't have PTSD - I think that most people end up avoiding the thing that caused the trauma in the first place.. almost a phobia kind of thing.
So if I was in an accident with a ladder, I'd probably feel really like avoiding ladders as much as possible..

In my case (and in yours), I was raped by a black male, and everytime I even consider starting to feel attracted to one now, I get scared and back right off.
Logically I know that it's not the colour or race that's the problem.. but my body and emotions don't know that.. and it would take a huge amount of effort to get me to a point where I could be comfortable enough to even sit and have a conversation with a black male, if my intent (or his intent), was anything other than just chatting for a little while.

How are you feeling about the man now? do you think he's decent enough and understanding enough that he'd be happy to take things really slowly with you until you're comfortable?

xx

I don't know about racism in this situation but ask yourself if sex with a white man would cause you the same anxiety. *mod edit* Fear is an instinct. If you're looking for answers, it's almost always best to follow your instinct. IMO