so last night i had a dream about 'him'...

Hey, that sounds awful. I'm sorry you had such a dream, even if you don't remember it entirely, it's still bad.
Just relax, he can't hurt you anymore.

Poor beata, I'm sorry.

I'm really sorry you had to go through that. I was severely physically abused by my father and for years it killed me to be anywhere near him...I truely hated him. It still bothers me A TON to be around him...for a long time I refused to talk to him and even now things have just never been the same. I guess I just want to say that I know what it's like to be so hurt by someone...to know that that person's life could move on but yours froze in that moment...to have such anger and fear...it sucks. It helps to know that times change and that you are greater now...you're an adult and you're not powerless anymore. You seem like a very strong person...I just get those vibes from you .
~Jen

hey, i won't drive u nuts with sorries, but can i get away with an " i identify with that?" cause ido....know right where ur comin from....here's a kicker for ya....after last "incident" was doing my 72 hrs in psych....and who comes walkin up???? my ex wife!!! i'm like just when i thoought things were beyond wierd.....turned out she works in that hospital....anyway....just thought i'd share....figured u wud appreciate the levity and dark humor there.....as far as yer ex goes.....there's always the flaming bag of dogshit on the porch routine....does wonders for yer sense of balance in things. take care....'core

Oh, it's ok, beata. I feel the same way sometimes, about finding understanding here but not in "real life".

I really mean't to say that no one should have to experience that and it's just not right that people do. Life's a tough place though and horrible things happen to people. You're a very resilent person beatachicka.

Hardcore-That's nuts. What did you do?

I just had the occurrence that it might be a good therapy practice to
imagine 'the hurt" as a decomposing body that needs to be buried way down the earth to avoid the natural stink that comes with the deteriorating flesh.
We cannot help but avoid any further "contact" with this "hurt" and it should remain buried for the rest of our life. Let the past "hurts" be gone forever! Let the new life begin.
Maybe our own creative minds can release us from the traumas that make our lives miserable. We have the choice of not dwelling with the past.

selfdoc wrote:I just had the occurrence that it might be a good therapy practice to
imagine 'the hurt" as a decomposing body that needs to be buried way down the earth to avoid the natural stink that comes with the deteriorating flesh.
We cannot help but avoid any further "contact" with this "hurt" and it should remain buried for the rest of our life. Let the past "hurts" be gone forever! Let the new life begin.
Maybe our own creative minds can release us from the traumas that make our lives miserable. We have the choice of not dwelling with the past.

selfdoc,
I watched my sister take that stance 20yrs ago, now the hurt is on top and she is having to deal with it.
So for some this may be a way of handling emotional pain, but it is not a permanent solution. The pain will still have to be dealt with at some point in time. And for 20 years my sister did not dwell on the past. She lived like it never happened, she buried like you said. Now she really questions even knowing who she is.

Our creative minds help us survive so much, until a time when we can handle it.

So when dealing with something so violent, or degrading or just hurt and scared it is better IMHO to look at it for what it is, and deal with it and go on with your life. You will find peace much quicker than burying it. just my humble opinion.

It would be wonderful if it was as easy as going through your CD's and just tossing out the ones you dont want anymore. (to let go)

You can not have emotional healing, without doing the emotional work?

peace,
red