Postpartum Psychosis Recovery

Hello all,

I suffered postpartum psychosis after the birth of my first child. It has been almost 5 months since my episode. The most serious symptoms resolved within 3 weeks of being on meds, but I am currently depressed (taking medication for that) and also experiencing a near-constant feeling of depersonalization/derealization that's constantly got me worried that I will be stuck in this phase forever or that I will revert back into psychosis. It's like I don't trust reality/my mind anymore. I don't have any delusions, I can "function" somewhat in the outside world, take public transport, go grocery shopping, etc. But my main feelings are that I am somehow "dead", walking around in a city I used to live in, and that I am somehow "unstuck" in time, like I can't comprehend what yesterday and tomorrow are, and a deep sense of alienation from myself/my identity. Of course becoming a mother on top of having psychosis was a double-assault on my identity. I'm just wondering if others have felt similarly while recovering from psychosis? It feels so awful, I feel like I will never gat back to "myself", I don't even know what that "self" is anymore.. it's terrifying.

I have felt like you share. I had postpartum psychosis with my third baby. All I can advise is to seek a doctor so perhaps you can be referred to a psychiatrist. Maybe, perhaps you still need to be on some meds or just seeking treatment for your symptoms you describe. I was later diagnosed as Bipolar I. Not to say you will be that, but maybe you just need help from a specialist to get you back to feeling like your old self again.

I apologize for not replying sooner, I have been away for a little bit, from the forum so I am just now catching up.

And I forgot to say, Welcome to Psych Forums!!!

P.S. Try visiting the Delusional Disorder forum and see what others have to share as well.