Thank you for reading this

I find it frustrating that there isn't anywhere I can express anger, and get supportive validating constructive feedback.
I express myself in violent terms, I have a loud voice, I make threats, I swear a lot.
I am incapable of forgetting/forgiving.

Perhaps you've heard of the phenomenon in basketball called "throwing an elbow"
A player is targeted to be the victim.
A person on the opposing team distracts the referee, and then another person slams his elbow into the ribs of the target. The ref looks back right at the moment when the targeted player throws a punch in self defense.
I don't think I am always in the right, but I do feel targeted in this way, most of my life.

I don't want to forgive. I think people who injure me should be punished and suffer as much as they have made me suffer.

I don't want drugs or 'therapy' that is going to neuter me. I want allies. I'm sick of talking with people who say "Yeah, that's bad and it bugs me too" and then I say "Lets hurt the bad people and change the bad things" and then the person who was just agreeing with me suddenly turns into a coward.

I hate people who say things like "that's the way it's always been, you can't change it".
I hate this fashion of mocking those who are justifiably angry as "Karen".