Welcome To The Dark Side

Oh my Lord
Lordy Lordy
Lord on Fire
Lordamundo
Don't you just hate
Whiney self-pitying poetry
How about this, bitch
How about you turn that frown upside down
And get a plane, bus, taxi to my place
You'll love it at my place
I've painted all the walls weird psychedelic colours
And painted over the glass on the windows
And soundproofed the walls
So we're all just sealed off from the outside world
I can only see outside
When I open the door to let my cat out
Isn't that just what you've always wanted?
To be just left the ###$ alone?
With nobody telling you to do this or that
And just be safe inside a weird house
With a bunch of weird people
Who love you for what you are
And don't care about your sickness
Or your weird clothes
Or your inverted nipples
That my cat will find fascinating
If you want to just sit there in the corner
The sit in the corner
That's right, wreckheads
Come to my place
The only rule is
There is no spoon
No
The only rule is
Before you enter
Strip naked an do the truffle shuffle
Just to break the ice, you understand
And then you are part of our little tribe forever
And nothing can touch you
Life can't touch you
And you'll live happily ever after
High on ecstasy
In my kitchen
Don't be afraid
Ecstasy is awesome
And my cat understands now
That your elevated body temperature
Is nothing to worry about
In fact
When I drip with sweat
When I'm high on ecstasy
My cat she likes to lick my cheeks
That rough female feline tongue
Oh my
It feels so nice
Come with us
Come to the Dark Side
I also like carrot cake