Anxiety over job

So I start a new job today. Operating sophisticated equipment and I'm sure they ain't running a charity. Perform, or perish.

I could have just as easily posted in general anxiety but I'll start here then do moderator voodoo later. I mean I do have OCD so yeah.

If I let myself I can get really messed up over this. So many worries. I'm forgetful. Absent minded. ADD. Desperate. The list goes on. What ifs out the yin yang.

Well, what ifs are just that. And I can't find out without getting out there. I just make peace with the idea of failure, which isn't the same thing as accepting it or giving up. Just make peace with it.

With OCD we constantly put the cart before the horse. that has to end, for all of us. Somewhere, between being irresponsible and paranoid, there's a medium to aim for. Today I have to practice my own advice to defer worry.

Too many times we are self defeating, I feel.

I can do this. You can do this. We're more than our intrusive thoughts. If something bad happens, well, it does. We can only take reasonable action to prevent our obsessive fears from being reality and then after that have some faith. In God, in yourself, in something, but have some faith. Ain't easy but seriously I don't want to be stuck in my OCD forever and neither do y'all.