post fatal accident.... is it P.D.S.D.??

I am a semi truck driver and have only been at it for about 6 months or so... on the 18th of November I was a passenger of a fatal crash.... the things I saw that day are now playing out in my subconscious. when I drive my personal car I freeze up and can't breath, my dreams have been waking my up and weight loss from not being able to eat. I don't like to give detail about what happened I can say that, a RV pulled out infront of us and the semi drove into the driver seat and both people inside the RV were tossed out , the driver smashing the window infront of me..... When I went to see if anyone was inside the RV the only thing I saw was the mans shoe still tied on the floor bourd. I then saw them laying in the street motionless, I hopped to the bodies ( I injured my leg) as they lay there... It was a mess!!!! both bodies were very mangled.... and bloddy..... My flash backs when I drive are of the bodies flying at me, but my dreams start with the impact of the RV then flash to a Doberman Pincher barking and snarling at me as spit and foam is flying at me from across a small dirt road, then a very large truck doing like 100 mph. races two feet infront of me knocking me to the ground........ then I wake up sweating and almost on the verge of tears...... I haven't remembered my dreams in over15 years let alone nightmares....... I have a very strong outlook " If I can't control anything else I can control myself." And now that's very hard to do as far as my crying and weird visions.... What's going on?????

It could be, alot of people who have been in a car accident like you have and lost someone or was severely injured can develop PTSD because of that trauma.

Not everyone who suffers from PTSD suffer from abuse related traumas, they can occur from anything from that to car accidents, to robbery etc, anything that is traumatic to another person.

I'd seek help for this and talk to someone that can help you learn to cope with this. I'm sorry you experienced something so horrific.

There is a diffrent between Post Traumatic stress and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Sounds like you are living PTS and some survior guilt as well.... though I am not a professional. Just how you are describing you symptoms are somewhat the same as my hubbies.

He suffers from terriable nightmares and remembrance like you do as well. He was in Iraq for 19 months and was approaching a car stopped at a check point when a car bomb went off killing 8 soldiers...He had to pick up the peices afterwards.

Just know that it wasn't your fault, there was nothing more you could do and please the sooner you seek help the better. They briefed us on the sooner that people seek help the quicker they are able to help them get back to living a normal life.

I want you to know that what you feel may never go away, but their are ways to dealing and coping with it and if you need someone to talk to... you can IM me.