I've Become Terrified of Falling Asleep?

Thank you for choosing to view this. I am not in a healthy state mentally. I've grown to hate the feeling of being tired, and I have severe anxiety when trying to fall asleep (several times, there have been panic attacks.) i think it's because i fear losing control. i won't be up and alert to protect myself.

long story short, December of 2011 - March 2012 my mom's boyfriend's son was living with us. he was there on the weekends, and would rape or molest me every night he was there. i was on Seroquel during this time, making me very tired and unable to defend myself.

do you think that is the cause of my fear? and do you have any advice on how to overcome this fear of mine? it started several weeks ago but it's gotten worse. i haven't slept since 3pm on Friday and I'm just so.. so tired.

kalley1618 wrote:Thank you for choosing to view this. I am not in a healthy state mentally. I've grown to hate the feeling of being tired, and I have severe anxiety when trying to fall asleep (several times, there have been panic attacks.) i think it's because i fear losing control. i won't be up and alert to protect myself.

long story short, December of 2011 - March 2012 my mom's boyfriend's son was living with us. he was there on the weekends, and would rape or molest me every night he was there. i was on Seroquel during this time, making me very tired and unable to defend myself.

do you think that is the cause of my fear? and do you have any advice on how to overcome this fear of mine? it started several weeks ago but it's gotten worse. i haven't slept since 3pm on Friday and I'm just so.. so tired.

Sorry you are going through this hard time. I know all too well what happens without sleep. I might suggest you speak to your Doc about this issue and see if perhaps he/she can recommend a medication to help you but also therapy to deal with what is keeping you from sleeping. I wouldn't wait either, maybe even call today? Good luck and I hope you get some sleep soon. Just know you are now safe if you close your eyes.

Firstly, I'm sorry to hear about the prolonged abuse you suffered. I think it's fairly understandable if this is the reason why you are having trouble falling asleep lately. It would be worth going to the doctor to see if you have any other things going on that might be contributing to your lack of sleep but I certainly wouldn't be surprised if this is some sort of reaction to the abuse you suffered. Do you have a therapist that you can talk about the rape and molestation with? You might also find it helpful to have an outlet for any difficult feelings about what happened by talking to a therapist and maybe this might make you be able to start to feel safer when you go to sleep.

In the meantime, the simplest solution I can think of is for you to put a lock on the door. Essentially putting a lock on will be avoidance of dealing with the fear, so this is why I would suggest you get proper help for long term because you don't want to make your reaction worse by then fearing sleeping without a lock ever again...

in the time before my next appointment with my therapist, i will definitely try that lock on the door idea. thank you. if that doesn't work, my boyfriend will be home later today and then maybe i could sleep if he was awake.

How has your sleep been going?

Did you end up trying any of the ideas or speaking to your therapist?

I hope things have been a bit better for you since the last time you wrote...