Truth or Consequences

Founded in fantasy
Fed by dishonesty
Sneaking, deception and lies
A “friendship” was born
With no thought for consequence
Held on to in spite of the one who is wronged

Refusing all logic
And all pleas to conscience
No sympathy, guilt or remorse
The two continue in their fairy “friendship”
Defiling the temple of love

Slowly it eats away,
Rot from within,
The sacred trust hallowed before time began
The marriage vows broken
Fidelity lost
And all for a “friendship”
And oh, what a cost!

Think not that the justice of Karma be stayed
She is not so blind as to just turn away
The price will be paid
And the price will be great
This “friendship” will bind them to unhappy fate!

I don't know why, but your poem sort of reminded me of a "friends with benefits" relationship. But much, much darker. I really like your writing style and choice of words. I also liked the condecendingly enthusiastic "!" at the end. Good work!

Thanks ! It was actually inspired by the ongoing so-called "friendship" my husband was having with another woman, which almost wrecked our marriage. It was almost, but not quite, a physical affair, but was definitely an emotional affair. He seems to be finally over it, thank god...but I was on the verge of a divorce many times in the past few months. I just don't "get" these women who think it is OK to fool around with someone else's mate.
My husband's "excuse" was his BP hypomanic episode.

Devanna. I too love your poem. Empowering.

I am sorry to hear about your husbands "manic episode". My friends mother was diagnosed bi-polar and borderline after they had found she had been scamming money off the books (for years) at work and an on-going sexual affair with her brother in-law (also for years and for money). Much more which includes impulsive spending and gambling came at quite a shock to the family. Her husband is divorcing her, her children have shunned and denied her visitation with their children. All in spite of her being a wonderful loving and caring mother and grandmother. I do understand their pain and hurt however.

As you state

I just don't "get" these women who think it is OK to fool around with someone else's mate. My husband's "excuse" was his BP hypomanic episode

I am assuming you trust that your husband was upfront with these many women about being married, if not, why do you think they should have known he was married?

My friends mother claims she was aware, yet had no "cares" or "concerns" during these manic times, using sex as a 'tool' so to speak, as the need for $$ at the moment outweighed the possible consequences. So I am curious as to that... for I see how her family feels it wouldn't be much of an excuse if she were aware. I am sorry for your situation. As a single, thirty-something female, I can attest to many a married man willing a 'slip of the ring' for a secret encounter. Most of them slip before you notice

I do however find it difficult to be supportive to my friend because he really is not budging an inch of the most remote possibility that his mother is capable of getting better. This all came about with her finding she has insulin-dependent diabetes as well, that nearly took her life, and left her on a kidney transplant list and hundreds of thousands $ in the hole. She does have the greatest of intentions I believe. Any advice or suggestions would be appreciated and wishing Good Luck to you as well.

OH yes, the little twit knew quite well he was married. Apparently she got some kind of sick thrill out of being pursued by an attractive "older" man. She is also not a well person, being unmedicated for ADD...a really great type for a BP to be around. He has straigtened out with several visits to the pdoc and another meds change, and we have had quite a few converstations about the whole episode.

He tells me he loves me and is sorry for what happened. While he was in the episode though, he did't really seem to care how I felt. He knew he was hurting me, but he couldn't seem to stop the behavior. ( He has since dubbed it "romantic Tourette's...since he knew he was going to keep contacting the twit, and did't really want to, but "couldn't stop himself" ).

Anyway, there really is hope for your friend's mother, if she gets proper care. And one of the most important things is that the people who love her stick with her and give her support...even though it is EXTREMELY difficult to do when the behavior of the person is so bad. What you have to realize is that its the disease talking ...but it is very hard to do. My husband has since told me how much it means to him that I didn't abandon him during all this mess.

I wish you luck with your friend. I recommend he read some books on dealing with Bipolar loved ones. One I have is called "Loving Someone with Bipolar Disorder", and another good one is the Bipolar Survival Manual. There is also a lot of good info on this board in the Bipolar section, as well as many other BP support boards that have been invaluable to me as help to understand what is going on. His mom really needs him now.