Who Am I?

I told Brooke “It felt like I was waking up from a dream”, but I had no recollection of when I had actually fallen asleep.
She said “do you feel like everything is finally coming to a head.”
“Yes”
It had taken 7 years of applying chaos theory to an already complex set of memories
Things I had forgotten
Things that would have stayed hidden from my psyche until the end of the earth if I had not asked the questions
If she had not broken my defenses with well-timed stimuli.
I wanted to hug her on more than one occasion.
Could I be this elusive?
Could I have been walking in a multitude of shoes all these years?
The world has become much colder and more hostile since I began to grow up again.
I am still 10, still 24, still 44, still trying to decide who I was and who I intend on becoming.
There are no places to hide from what has sat sullen and broken into three equal parts,
That seem to volley for dominance and the right to serve.
I am still a bit confused
Even though I understand the necessity to parlay all of the players into one unified bet against humanity,
That I may be the embodiment of the child, the dreamer,
The Marine, the fighter,
The young man, the lover
The present, the professor.
I am no more than any of you
Yet I feel as if I have lived on a hundred earth’s
In a hundred bodies
And I want to shed a single tear for each of the death’s I have encountered on my journey to oneness.
I am most afraid of losing the child
But as I sit here I realize that nothing magical comes from not realizing the truth you had brought with you.
I am a writer, and an altruist
And I can sense the frequency and temperament of the world when I sit in silence.
Come with me.