where is this going? you ask...

i squirm in my seat. this is the conversation that i have been dreading for months now. i have mulled over the answer to this question over many a cup of coffee. the truth is not pretty. i hesitate for a minute too long. you squint your eyes at me and repeat yourself. oh how badly i want to tell you that i love you and that i want to be with you always. but the words won't come out. if there is anything that i cannot do, it is to flat out lie. i am many things but a liar i am not. i don't know how to lie. i prefer all of the ugliness that the truth brings, more so than the feelings that come along with being fake and deceitful. in my recurrent ponderings over coffee i came to this conclusion. i have been using you for sometime now and this 'relationship' will only continue on until i need nothing more from you, or until you are no longer willing to give it to me. this is not a deduction that i am proud of but it is not all together horrible either. i believe that everyone uses eachother in one way or another. it is human nature. to take whatever it is that you need from whomever is willing to give it to you. and the cycle goes on. this is why i feel no guilt. i am aware that you are not the 'one'. and so do you. we had some really good times together.thankyou you for helping me find my way. and goodbye.

I like this i can relate. Telling people something thats hard how uncomfortable it is. keep up the good work