My mother

[LunarDrop~]

(This topic is not about me parenting, I am not a parent. This focuses on problems I have with my mother, if it does not fit here, please let me know.)

I am an asexual, depressed schizoid teeager (female).

I have gotten very high grades in all subjects until last year, when I entered middle school. My math grade dropped a letter grade, and my mother went off.

I -until last year- only got A's and B's on report cards. I never studied, I had a good memory and just winged things. Latley, that has not put a good imprint on me, I cannot study for tests effectively, and will not take work home.

But when I get ONE c, my mother obsesses over it and gets angry. She points out only the negative, not even noticing the three or four A's and two B's. She grounds me and holds it over my head.

Today I got a report card, three C+'s, and two A's and one B. She keeps holding it over my head. We were having a light conversation with my sister, my age slipped mom's mind, I pretended to be offended and said to my sister "I want to go for a bit, lets take a walk" Mom instantly turned serious and said "With your grades, what makes you think you deserve to go for a walk?"

Last year I became a depressed schizoid, and my asexuality kicked in. Thats also when I was being bullied, and hated school. I think my mother isnt taking that into consideration

When I do something that displeases her in front of somebody, she will give me the dirtiest look. (similar to this.) to shush me.

I know she loves my sister more then me too, she is older, studies hard, and is social. She always compares me to her (Example: "Your sister got into the national honors society, you should be shooting for that too." "You need to get better grades, look at your sister's grades.")

Can somebody tell me how to express my frustration at her high, high expressions?

[Tempest88]

Can you print this post off and show it to her? Or would she get mad that you talk about these 'private' things with other people?

If that's the case, I would write her a letter... start it off in a non-confrontational manner... she sounds like the type who gets her hackles up over small things. You could start off saying "This is how I feel, how things look from my perspective" type of way. Make her more aware you're a person in your letter.. when you're talking about yourself... you could say "I, your daughter ______ (name)" or something to that effect... to remind her you're her daughter and a person.

Avoid saying things like "You make me feel" and instead say "When this happens I feel" so she doesn't feel like you're pointing a finger and will possibly be more open to really hearing what you're trying to say.

Talking about how you're feeling and what you're going through. If you're unsure of it, have someone give it a read over before you give it to her.

Leave the letter somewhere you know she will find it, or give it directly to her.

[LunarDrop~]

She doesnt feel that she is in the wrong at all, though.

(Got to go to school, sorry for short post)

[Tempest88]

She doesnt feel that she is in the wrong at all, though.

You don't need to word it as if she is in the wrong. Just stating how certain actions make you feel/think and explain why.

[LunarDrop~]

What angers me is how everything is about her.
I don't bother to dress up for a party;
"You're not going to the party looking like a slob, it'll look like I dont give you clothing."
I continue to use my clipboard (it has sentimental value to me) thats cracked in two;
"I don't cared if you 'fixed it', it looks like I cant afford a new clipboard."

I wish she would just consider me.