22 year old shut in son

[david439]

This is actually about my brother, but I was hoping for some advice on what a parent should do about this situation. My brother is 22. Since graduating from high school he rarely leaves the house. He doesn't have a job or go to school and he doesn't appear to have any friends. He spends all his time either on the computer or harassing his mom and younger brothers. At one point last year he didn't take a shower for an entire month. When I, or anyone else talks to him about going to college or getting a job he'll give some lame excuse for not doing so.

Does anyone have any insight into what's going on with him? I'm conflicted over whether he has a serious mental disorder or whether he's just being a lazy bum. He had a troubled childhood though none of his siblings is a complete shut in like him. One of our siblings has psychotic bipolar disorder though. I sort of wonder if the shut in brother is in the prodormal stage of a serious mental disorder. Any insight?

[Greatexpectations]

Seems like your brother could do with some help, I doubt he is just lazy. A parent should encourage him to talk to a doctor or councillor. He could write down how he's feeling and show that to the doctor.
Will he speak to you about it at all?

[Cate68]

Hello. I'm new. I have a nephew who is agoraphobic.

My sister, my nephew's mother has been very very patient with my nephew. He takes anti anxiety medications and assists my sister with her Civil Engineering.

I think that patience, therapy, a safety net and career choices which involve either a self run business situation or situation involving privacy are important to discuss.

Some folks get on disability. Work with the brother as much as possible and see if there are ways to motivate and stimulate him to do more like go for sports or a job, but if there is a point of stopping, it may be time for a family meeting.

Good luck.