Teleiophilia and in Love

Woo, yay, first post!

So, how do I start this... Hi, I'm Eggshell and I'm an addict. Maybe that's not quite right. Ah, well.

Maybe I'll just get to the point. I'm 16, turning 17 this January and I'm psyched! I'm almost an adult and soon will be free to like whoever I please. I'm finally growing into my teleiophilia. Life's been hard since the onset of puberty (at 9, would you believe it?), but I've suddenly come up against a bit of a wall. Well, actually, it's a couple different walls. Since I already mentioned the teleiophilia, I think I'll start there.

I've never liked a guy my age. Sure, I've pretended, but ever since I started getting that fancy itch between the legs, it's always been for older guys. And I mean older. You can keep the baby faced pretty boys, I've always been exclusively attracted to wise eyed guys. The oldest guy I was attracted to? My debate teacher in 9th grade: he was in his 70's. Now, generally, it's kept to a much more manageable age group, thirties, forties... you get it. I'm sure every girl develops crushes on guys like that. But my real problem now is trying to differentiate this fettish, which I've all but come to terms with, from actual affection.

Let's call him Waldo. I've felt something for Waldo for more than four years. It started off as admiration. I wasn't even physically attracted to him from the get go. He's... quite frankly perfect. People could argue that, I'm sure, but for me he is. When we talk, and spend any small amount of time (always appropriate) together, it just seems right. The problem is, he's fifty, and he's my teacher. Over time, it's gotten worse and worse. Or maybe better is the right word. I've learned a lot about him, and been able to piece his life together from the other gossipy teachers and his family members (served food at his 50th birthday party and eavesdropped on them as they reminisced on the good and the bad). I'm smitten. You don't need that sob story though. I just want to know here if you think that the way I feel towards him, which I'm gonna call love, 'cause I've never felt I thing like it and probably never will again, is wholly because of who he is and who I am, or if my teleiophilia could have a hand in it?

If you like, I can tell you plenty more. I'd love to share more about him. =3 Oh, yeah, or about myself. XD

Hi Eggshell,

Welcome to the forum! I don't think what you describe constitutes a problem. It seems very common for women to be attracted to older males, particularly as the qualities attractive to women tend to revolve around image, status, physical prowess, etc., and these are qualities more common in older males. By contrast the things attractive in females are associated with youth. In short, I wouldn't worry about being attracted to older men.

Whether you act on your feelings is a different matter. If the guy is married with children, you could cause a lot of damage. Many men are easily led astray sexually, especially when a young 17-year-old shows signs of wanting intimacy. But if he has a wife and kids, then this means a lot of harm could be done. Besides this, I presume there are laws in your jurisdiction about a teacher being with a student. Here in the UK, the age of consent is 16, but in the case of teachers and students the law says 'no hanky panky' until 18 (though even then there are presumably prohibitions imposed by university codes of conduct, etc.). Play it careful.