I think I might be a pedophile

I'm gonna try and keep this short. I'm a 23 year old girl and I'm attracted to little girls. I have a finance who I love with all my heart and I think is the sexiest person I've ever met. I've been attracted to women before on and off and I've always liked to watch porn of girls that look young.

But lately, I've been nonstop thinking about my kid sister's friend (who's 12, and looks it) and I absolutely can't get her out of my head. Every time I see her I go crazy and can't get her out of my head for weeks. Also, for the past year or so I've been extremely turned on by preteen and young-teen girls, like anywhere in the 6-14 range. My fantasies are always about my forcing them into sexual acts, which disgusts me. Even just writing this I'm getting turned on and hating myself at the same time.

I also sometimes have fantasies about seducing boys too but usually they're older, like 13-16 and it's not usually a specific boy. I even dated a 17 year old kid when I was 20. I know it's still wrong but honestly I feel like that's the lesser of two evils right now.

It's this one girl in particular though who's driving me insane. I know right now I'd never act on anything but the thoughts have just been getting progressively worse. I'm also going to see her a lot this summer because she and my sister are on a softball team together and my family wants me to go to a lot of the games. I'm scared and I feel alone because I never really hear about female pedophiles. If anyone has ANYTHING that will help I'd appreciate it soooo much. Thanks for listening :/

If it helps, I'm a gay female (early 30s). I am attracted to females from the onset of pubescence to the menopause, which I consider to be a 'normal' age range of attraction. It's interesting that you say the youngest age you are attracted to in males is higher, as I would imagine the characteristics that render males attractive are those that develop later, whereas the characteristics that make females attractive (petite, slender, cute) are probably naturally coupled with pubescent youth.

I wouldn't worry too much about it. We're all attracted to people we can't or shouldn't have. That's part of life. The grass is always greener somewhere else. Do right by others, but enjoy the sweet element of the bitter-sweet longing. Sexuality is wonderful, and as long as you're comfortable with yourself then society's prejudicial, spiteful and controlling normative and categorical thinking can just wash over you.

maybe you should get a therapist or something to help with that. It is something very serious. Maybe you can slowly get yourself to liking older women or men instead. I'm not totally sure how to do this ,though. Maybe address exaclty why you think younger girls are attractive. This is a really hard problem to have, but at least you realize it is a problem and are trying to get advice on it. I would try to avoid her, honestly. I know there are people who like shota... I am pretty sure that's like anime little girls looking cute and all that. Maybe look at cartoon porn..but are you not attracted to cartoons? It just feels like it is more acceptable to be attracted to young cartoons than actual people. There is probalby a type of treatment that can keep you from wanting younger girls. Probably associationg something disgusting wth them. If you get those urges think of something that grosses you out or turns you off and tyr associating it with them. I'm not so sure what else to say. Sorry I'm not better at this. XD;

Wow Gina, thanks for making me feel better about all this! Haha. That is very true what you said about girls developing attractiveness before boys. I just worry what'll happen if it goes any further...

JPKAS, no I'm not at all attracted to cartoons. Kinda weirds me out honestly XD It's hard to avoid her as she's on my sister's team and my sister would be heartbroken if I didn't go to her games. And as for associating bad things with them, it's going to be hard but that's probably good advice. I'll try it.

Yeah.....I would just try to go to an therapy session on the sly and deal with it. : S You don't want to end up doing something you'll regret and that will hurt somebody.