embarrassing question

I would like to offer my own insights into your question. I think me and you are much closer in circumstances than anyone else who visits this board so I think I can understand your feelings better than everyone else. I'm a 16 year old guy and around your age I was exposed to porn that had bdsm tones to it. At first it disgusted me and I would hate to think about it but the thoughts kept coming into my head. Over time I began to look at similiar stuff more and more. Now I'm comfortable with my sexuality and feel no shame in these type of fantasies. However I am still just as turned on by vanilla thoughts. I don't know if this is the type of answer your looking for but it's my opinion that bdsm is a part of everyones sexuality and when people become aware of it they usually embrace it. However it is still possible to maintain a normal sexual fantasy world at the same time. I honestly don't believe you will be able to get rid of the thoughts and the best you will be able to do is suppress acting on them. But if it bothers you that much you should try talking to a professional.