Talking with your girlfriend about your past

Hello,

I'm new here. There's one thing I like to know your opinion about. There's always a thing that comes between me and girlfriends when it gets serious: it's my past. I don't like to talk about it, but I feel a lot of shame when it comes to it. I don't dare to talk about it. It's groce and it happened more than 20 years ago. I'm afraid of the reaction I'd get, especially after having slept with them.

Relationships will never work if I can't talk about it, I know now. But I'm afraid of telling. Afraid of the reaction, afraid of the probably great disappointment she'd have.

Having been "the girlfriend", I think she will appreciate it if you tell her. I, personally, feel so betrayed and untrustworthy that my boyfriend did not tell me until it tore him up inside. She deserves to know the truth and once you tell her, I think you'll feel so much better and hopefully it will only strengthen your relationship. If she loves you, she'll stand by your side and help you.

Good luck.

serendipity07 wrote:Having been "the girlfriend", I think she will appreciate it if you tell her. I, personally, feel so betrayed and untrustworthy that my boyfriend did not tell me until it tore him up inside. She deserves to know the truth and once you tell her, I think you'll feel so much better and hopefully it will only strengthen your relationship. If she loves you, she'll stand by your side and help you.

Good luck.

Thanks for your advice. She loves me.

I'm curious: how did you react to his revealing? Did your relationship end for other reasons?