Is Pedophilia in Women Rare?

Neuling wrote:It's understood that I may never fully satisfy any such 'yearning' for acceptance, but having some answers to questions I've struggled with for some time should suffice. From what I've gathered so far, these feelings I have probably stem from some vast loneliness I've always felt in some degree. Children usually do not sense my oddness or they find it to be quite interesting... whereas adults are more apt to find a category I must belong to so they can adjust their behavior accordingly. Rarely am I ever 'categorized' properly.

I think emotional intimacy from our parents is something many of us who have sexuality issues feel we lack. That, and often some form of humiliation or trauma experienced when we were kids. It's no wonder it seems so impossible to shorten the distance between us and others, (even people we call friends). Thanks for sticking around despite that discouragement.

I love that quality about children you mention, that they're so open even when they detect something strange about a person. Though a well-developed rational part of my brain does categorize things, I try to adopt that same childlike acceptance of others. When it comes to getting to know people I rarely think in terms of what's socially acceptable or unacceptable. Without even realizing it, this has opened me up to some of the most meaningful and lasting adult relationships I've ever had, but at the same time it's hard to really believe that despite my accepting nature, others will accept me so unconditionally, so I've told myself I don't want to be a burden on anyone for my emotional needs. It's an unfair double-standard to which I know I hold myself, but it gives me empathy for others like me at least. I'll see if I can gather a list of posts by other women pedophiles on this forum. Maybe that will answer a few of your questions.

Edit:
Here's all I can find with a decent amount of searching the forums through Google:
ilikeegg-u11577/posts/
love600-u6711/posts/
nomdeplume-u29281/posts/

You could try other keywords or other sub-forums. I tried "female" "woman" and a few others in the paraphilia and sex addiction sub-forums.
Just alter the search accordingly on this page:
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&client=firefox-a&rls=org.mozilla%3Aen-US%3Aofficial&q=female+site%3Apsychforums.com%2Fparaphilias%2F&btnG=Search&aq=f&oq=&aqi=

I just came across these today. All are by a woman named Nancy Friday:

WARNING - The previews provided by following the links on the book overview pages within each of these may contain some stories or descriptions TRIGGERING for abuse victims and will probably cause a reaction if you're a pedophile.
My Secret Garden
Forbidden Flowers
Beyond My Control

There's fairly conclusive proof that pedophilia among other things (like zoophilia) in women is definitely not rare.

Note: I actually found out about this author and the first of those books, My Secret Garden, through the epilogue of an erotic horror/thriller novel called Firefly by Piers Anthony which has pedophile and rape scenes.

I guess it would make sense that females would be just as susceptible to pedophilia as males. Although often stereotyped that males have more of a sex drive than females, in real life the distribution of sexual intensity can vary from individual to individual. Sometimes there will be males with limited sexual drive while there are women with a more prevalent drive much akin to what is viewed as stereotypical for males... then of course, the more expected proportions, and then proportions that are more balanced between the genders.

Perhaps characteristic for most pedophiles, my sex drive can be quite high, and sex does occupy myth mind rather prevalently -- often throughout the day. Usually I'm content to let my mind wander through fantasies. Even though I may imagine scenarios with children, there are plenty of other interests I can focus my attention on if I should start to feel guilty. I suppose it would be easy enough to 'age' the objects of my fantasy in my mind's eye to a more appropriate age.

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S3, thank you for the links. I'll skim through the old posts here and see what I can turn up in regards to female pedophiles.

You're most welcome
The books I listed above explore the female sex drive very thoroughly, though with a non-professional approach. They aren't just erotic stories, they try and make an important point about women and their sexuality, and sexuality in general. I've only skimmed a couple parts but they seem fascinating.

Pedophilia is common in people who didn't experience their childhood up to it's full potential.
Fame at young age often leads to pedophilia, and one begins to think you're young forever in the most severe cases.

Pedophilia may indeed by common.
But pederasty isn't.

I know that pederasty can cause psychological damage, and have witnessed people first-hand whom have experienced such trauma.
Pedophilia is impossible as a long-term attraction, because your mate will eventually grow into an adult, anyway.

The root of the trauma is unknown, but when a pre-pubescent or non-sexual being experiences sexual advances, they wonder what it is, because they don't feel as much themselves.
Confusion at such a young age, makes the victim feel psychological that's right, and when they grow up becoming a pedophile themself.

While this may indeed not be too severe, to be on the safe side it should be prevented.
We've all been children, and the more modern parents have used role models like the child catcher and the bogeyman to frighten kids to stay away from strangers (potential murders, kidnappers and pederasts, etc).

Many of these deterrents did not exist back in my childhood, but as a parent once, myself, I indeed did try my best to influence my late child to be scared of strangers, so no what I call 'weirdos' could take him away.

If you do feel the need to commit pederasty, you should try to harness yourself.
It's unsafe, I do feel for pederasts for how they cannot have something they crave, but seeking pleasure out of it, while children's mentality are stake is bad.

There are many ways to deal with it.
But there's only one key way...
Will power - and it appears most don't have that.

Things like zoosexuality are not bad because both parties are usually sexual and adult, however pedo-bestiality does also exist.
Necrophilia is bad for both your health and disrespects the dead (but it depends on your morals), this can exist towards different ages, sexes and species.

Believe it or not, there's more women than men who are pedophilic.
Just there's more male pederasts than there is female.

Personally, I am completely against sex with pre-pubescents.
But I won't let my opinion offend this topic.

Regards,
James

Pedophilia is common in people who didn't experience their childhood up to it's full potential.
Fame at young age often leads to pedophilia, and one begins to think you're young forever in the most severe cases.

Michael Jackson you mean? How many famous people are paedophiles? Barely any. How many paedophiles are famous? Barely any. That statment just isn't true. That's just an excuse MJ fans use to justify listening to his music. MJ isn't even proven to be a paedophile. If he is one.. he may have been one even if he hadn't became famous or was treated like crap by his dad.

I sure lived my childhood to it's potential, I can't find any holes in it. It was a pretty ordinary childhood. I'm a paedo.

Actually, I disagree with most of what you say. I wont quote everything, but I find it funny that a person who is attracted to animals - not even his own species - would find it difficult to understand that sexuality doesn't always need a meaning as to why it exists. It exists just because it does.. it can be utterly pointless. But you're welcome your own beliefs.

JamesDSmith wrote:Pedophilia may indeed by common.
But pederasty isn't.
...
There are many ways to deal with it.
But there's only one key way...
Will power - and it appears most don't have that.
...
Believe it or not, there's more women than men who are pedophilic.
Just there's more male pederasts than there is female.

What is the difference between pedophiles and pederasts beyond how they choose to act with their attraction? Would it be like the difference between people who are only interested in zoophilia and those who actually practice it? Sorry, I'm a little unfamiliar with your use of the term pederast, (meaning one who engages in pederasty). I've always understood pederasty as, "sexual relations between two males, esp. when one of them is a minor." (Dictionary.com) Do you mean child sex offender, someone who has already offended a child? Or do you mean someone who wants to offend but might not?

I think most pedophiles exercise willpower, but, obviously, none of the offenders do. I agree with your point about the difference in behavior between male and female pedosexuals. For men, sex is a stronger motivation it seems. I'm interested to know where you studied sexology if you don't mind saying. I've never talked to a sexologist before. Welcome to the forum.

I'm a woman. I'm a... attracted to younger girls. I'm 29 now, and I'm most recently been in love with a 14 year old. just raising my hand to say 'there are others', because I nearly cried with relief that there were others.

I'm in a relationship(polyamorously) but the girl I've been chatting with is 20, in college... but looks much, much younger.

I'm actually in kind of a crisis place, because I really am not comfortable with my... particular vein of attraction.

my masturbatory fantasies typically involve children, but the girl I was in love with... it had nothing to do with sex... at all. I truly fell for her.

my current girlfriend is 19, and knows about this. She's been an amazing beam of support for me, and my friends and family know also, and are also supportive, they all know I want to find some help for this.

anyhow.

so yeah, I'm a chick, and i'm out here.

It's both sad and encouraging to see another female pedophile faithlessfate.

The males here have been very friendly and have offered considerable insight... even encouraged me to seek help. However, even though some are pedophiles, there are limits to how much they can truly relate as they aren't female.

I am bisexual, and haven't noticed favoring one gender over the other (as far as I can tell). This extends into pedophilia as well. In fact, I think it's even worse because boys and girls do not differentiate nearly to the degree as men and women do externally... at least not until the onset of puberty.

I tend to develop a strong attachment to children that extends beyond simply sexual interest. I guess it starts with affinity, care, and possibly love and then perverts into including sexual desires. This can make things very difficult as you care for the child but have to realize that under all that care is considerable danger to the child. Good intentions are poor consolation for a child when you fail to understand your own nature and motivations.

I am learning to accept my "particular vein of attaction" as denying it or self-loathing won't really help the situation. In fact, it could lead to some terrible mistakes. If I deny my attraction then I leave myself free to follow where these attractions may lead. If I resort to self-loathing, I may hurt myself and possibly others (particularly children) while in a bout of depression or some other unhealthy frame of mind.

I admit what I am (at least to myself), and try to approach this as one would a lifelong disease. It's manageable and happiness in life is still possible.

Neuling wrote:I admit what I am (at least to myself), and try to approach this as one would a lifelong disease. It's manageable and happiness in life is still possible.

I'm working through that phase of it all now... seeking counselling, and trying to manage it.

thank you for your encouragement.