What's Wrong with Me?

I'm a 28-year-old virgin. I've never been intimate with anyone due to extreme shyness. I'm attracted to women of all ages, but I'm especially drawn to adolescent girls. I often fantasize about having rough sex with a 13-year-old. I don't feel tempted to act out on this desire because I know I could not live with the guilt and fear I'd experience afterwards. Still, I want these thoughts to go away. They make me feel like a monster. How do I make them stop?

Hi, Humanoid! You could try to think of adults when you fantasize, make a point out of it. Maybe looking for a girlfriend or at least having some contact with a woman who is your own age and you feel attracted to migh help as well.
Are you seeing any one about this? I hope somebody here can give you a bit more advice.

We are born with these feelings and there's nothing we can do. But we need to stick together. Please feel free to contact me personally I would like to get a feel for what you are going through. My paraphilia is bondage. I can't think about anything else. Please lets have a discussion via e-mail. There is no judgement here, I feel the same way.

Justin

I don’t know about that paraphiliac187 I’m young and have tried to get rid of these urges with really no avail but I wouldn’t say there is nothing you can do. I voluntarily attend a Registered Sex Offender group therapy, Individual Therapy and psychiatrist weekly and my urge to just go grab a little girl do what I want with her has lessened over the past 2 and a half years. I very rarely drive through neighborhoods looking for a little girl to abduct. I think I have actually gotten a lot better and I think my partner, therapists and doctors would agree with that.


Humanoid, I think an important thing to remember is being intimate with someone doesn’t nessacerly mean the same thing as having sex. But if you were just trying to simplify for us I get that too. There is help first thing you wouldn’t believe how much talking to people can help. I have told my therapist my deepest darkest most graphic fantasies. Then we have gone over them and it really lessened their hold on me. You really only force them to report you if you tell them you have hurt a child or you are going out and going to do hurt a child everything else is confidential. What jasmine said about finding an age appropriate partner really didn’t help that much for me but again I’m not attracted age appropriate partners. So it might help you, you could try it couldn’t hurt.

I agree with Lostson that thinking is not acting and talking to people can make it easier to cope but the feelings don't stop. Easier is not a cure. That's why we are on this site, if there was a cure we wouldn't be here. I like what you have to say, keep it coming.