aroused by the thought of paedophilia

Hello,

I think I am in a slightly similar boat as PBNJ, but was wondering if I could get some sound advice, as I have been somewhat disturbed by my own fantasies for a long time. (I am a female)

I don't know where to start, but basically, I have fantasies that I have no desire whatsoever acting out in real life, and which trouble me. For all of my life I have enjoyed healthy relationships, and enjoy a healthy sexual relationship with my partner. The problem is I have only been able to masturbate to fantasies of being raped, or being abused (me being a child and being raped). Usually I am the one providing pleasure or being 'used', for a short while it involved a child (young boy) 'using' me and getting sexual pleasure from me, but this passed and went back to the regular old rape/abuse fantasies.

When I think about these fantasies they trouble me, as I have no sexual attraction to children at all! And whats more, I find pedophilia deeply offensive and upsetting. And also, would never want to be raped, or hurt. Nor would I ever rape someone or hurt them - especially a child. The thought of this makes me sick, so you can understand why my own fantasies are upsetting me.

I wish I had more 'normal' fantasies about being whisked off my feet by a muscly hunk on the beach or something!

I thought I should also mention, that I have just finished about 7 years of therapy, recovering from depression, anxiety and OCD, and could never once tell my therapist about this stuff, though I wish I did. (I find it REALLY embarrassing and shameful).

I was never sexually abused as a child, I have no idea where this comes from.

NDP

Im in same boat as you I guess, so just hang in there.
But plz dont double post like this.

wow. you literally bashed a woman for saiyng that she find the thought of a child being sexually abused arousing. i just wanted to say that you are all a bunch of hypocrites.

you're saying that if she want to abuse a child that's wrong and disgusting but guess what, so do you. you want to abuse children. no, no, absolutely, when a child consent for sex it isn't abuse. wow, just wow. it is, it certainly is. i've read threads like:

''is all adult/child sex inherently bad?'',
''why do we live in a world where pedos are looked down upon?'',
''what exactly is harmful about it? '',
''it's not a disorder'',
''have you always wondered when society says children can't consent to sex, they are lying. do you ever get this feeling that society lies when they say that children can never consent to sex? i get this feeling and when i think about it, i feel that society is lying about this. do you also think that society lies when they say sex with a child causes harm?''

and many... many more. i don't see you calling these people disgusting and i don't see you arguing much with them. many of you actually agrees with them.

that woman know that it would hurt these children but you think you ''making love'' to them would not? they would be alright as long as they would agree to do it with you, right (you think they would fall for you or what)? plus she said it's just a fantasy. what about you, are you limiting yourself only to fantasies? i have read threads when some of you have said that you contacted a little girl online and you were talking with her for weeks. what could happen next? do you really think you're any better than her? i laughed when i've read this particular comment ''I think you need to see a therapist who specializes in sexuality. I'm done posting here because frankly the fact that you find the sexual abuse of a child arousing disgusts me to no end.'' are you kidding me? you are all as same disgusting because you want to have sex with children = abuse children and it's arousing for y'all as well so technically you find abuse of a child arousing... what the hell?!

some of people on forum are convinced molesters who actually hurt a child and you're comforting THEM but calling HER disgusting for a FANTASY?

you talking about how age of consent should be lower and alot of you admitted to watching cp (=child being abused) as well so you break the law already, you should be in jail, you should be punished for partial exploitation of that kid... and still you're calling her disgusting, you are the same. and when someone is comfortable with himself being a pedophile you say to him that it's a good thing and he shouldn't be ashamed of who he is. and when i called it disturbing you called me narrow minded and said that pedophilia soon will be renamed pedosexuality because it's a sexual orientation...

????????????

there was even this one thread where some guy asked how people can be attracted to adult women and not young girls, when adult women aren't good looking anymore. oh yeah i feel you man, 16+ are just plain ugly, with their pubic hair and breasts, gross!

and you're complaining about how parents allow their children to go out dressed like bla bla bla, it's your fault that you find it bad! it's just a child, it's your mind that sexualize them, normal person wouldn't have problem with that because for that person children are children, they don't care.

''anyone who says a 12 yr. old girl isn't attractive, is a dangerous liar'' (i read this somewhere too)

guess i'm a dangerous liar. i'm sorry that not everybody is as twisted as you. you should stop comforting yourself like that.

woman from this thread does not live in denial at least.
rationalizing, making excuses, that what i see you're doing all the time.

oh, and rape fantasy is not the same? how is that not the same? so fantasising about raping a grown up woman is kinda ok, not a big deal..? whoa...

i think i was definitely too hard on myself, i'm not that bad afterall.

disturbed, who exactly is your comment directed towards? Think about it. This is a psychology forum not a pedophile forum. Doesn't it occur to you that there are non-pedophiles and even antis posting here as well who might share completely different views from one another?

disturbed, this is a 7 year old thread. Saying "you bashed" isn't fair. Very few of the people who were part of it then are still active here.

We've clarified our aims in that time, I think. See the pink notice above every thread here for more information. Particularly around supporting each other in being healthy. Which doesn't including bashing from any angle.

On the other hand, most of the people who did were moderators and administrators at the time.

Whenever I consider joining an online community, I always read back threads to see how the issues important to me are likely to be addressed. When I read this specific thread in my back reading, I wasn't exactly encouraged either.

While the culture I've encountered since joining doesn't match the culture that those individuals were clearly operating in, I couldn't find where the transition point was, and I've spent some effort looking.

seanetal wrote:Born,

I think you need to see a therapist who specializes in sexuality. I'm done posting here because frankly the fact that you find the sexual abuse of a child arousing disgusts me to no end.

You could have been a bit more sensitive there.

seanetal wrote:Born,

I think you need to see a therapist who specializes in sexuality. I'm done posting here because frankly the fact that you find the sexual abuse of a child arousing disgusts me to no end.

Someone who specializes in sex and sexuality could potentially help you but honestly Seanetal I think you where kind of harsh on Born. I very much doubt Born would be the only person in the world to have this kind of paraphilia. I see Born as being no worse or better than me or anyone else who is attracted to children.

However I do completely respect your opinion so I hope you will mine.

Tulula.

<mod hat on> A reminder, this thread is VERY OLD. Sean posted Sat 10 Mar, 2007. If you want to have a new discussion based on issues raised here. Then that's fine. But I recommend doing it in a new thread. And sticking to the themes! Rather than addressing people who may or may not be around. To respond to queries on their posting from seven years ago.


<mod hat off> As an aside. I'd invite you, reader. To think back over your own opinions from 2007. To see how many of them are still held. And which have changed. It's an interesting exercise for me, anyway.

Ada wrote:<mod hat on> A reminder, this thread is VERY OLD. Sean posted Sat 10 Mar, 2007. If you want to have a new discussion based on issues raised here. Then that's fine. But I recommend doing it in a new thread. And sticking to the themes! Rather than addressing people who may or may not be around. To respond to queries on their posting from seven years ago.

Whoops, sorry Ada, I will take better care to check dates in the future, Im so bad at this .