Death and murder arouse me? *TW*

hi, well, im melissa and i guess there's something wrong with me, i mean corpses arouses me, i don't know if i am a necrophile, i like snuff videos like 3 guys 1 hammer,etc and i love when a person is being murdered i mean, the struggling and the screams, it arouses me so much, but i know it's wrong and i dont know what to do, i dont want to be this way, but i can't help it, people say that im sick in the head and im starting to believe them i mean, this isn't normal right?

theweirdgirl wrote:hi, well, im melissa and i guess there's something wrong with me, i mean corpses arouses me, i don't know if i am a necrophile, i like snuff videos like 3 guys 1 hammer,etc and i love when a person is being murdered i mean, the struggling and the screams, it arouses me so much, but i know it's wrong and i dont know what to do, i dont want to be this way, but i can't help it, people say that im sick in the head and im starting to believe them i mean, this isn't normal right?

Well, just because there's "something wrong" with a person, doesn't mean there's actually something wrong with me, you know what I mean? Thoughts are okay, we all have them and all of our interests are different. Deviant sexual thought and fantasies are a lot more common than you may think. It's good to remember that you're not harming anyone by thinking something and you're pleasing yourself at the same time.

Suppressing your urges won't help. You should indulge them, because everyone is just trying to be happy and everyone wants to get themselves off at night. Who cares how they do it? Maybe you should stick around here and get comfortable discussing more of your thoughts with this forum, because there's lots of people here that have "something wrong" with them. You'll fit right in.

Hi, Melissa.

As a necrophile, I think you've got a fetish for sadism more than anything else. Obviously these things are fine if they're kept in the head and in fantasy, but different individuals have to draw the line in different places if they're going to indulge these fantasies without edging into dangerous territory.

...but i know it's wrong and i dont know what to do, i dont want to be this way, but i can't help it, people say that im sick in the head and im starting to believe them i mean, this isn't normal right?

No, it's not 'normal', but plenty of perfectly decent human beings have these sorts of fetishes and deviated attractions. They're perfectly harmless in most of us. From your quote there, I don't think you sound like a psychopath. The biggest practical problem most necrophiles, and sadists etc have, is living with our own consciences due to the things we're attracted to.

Graveyard76 wrote:The biggest practical problem most necrophiles, and sadists etc have, is living with our own consciences due to the things we're attracted to.

That's because of social conditioning. Some are more sensitive to it than others.

I've learned to let go of my shame. Don't you want to know how to do that?

"If people knew about this, they would shun me..."

I wonder what goes on in their head behind closed doors. Deviant fantasies are very common, but most people feel ashamed because of what they've been taught about their natural desires. They're natural, there's nothing wrong with them. Everyone should do what makes them happy.

theweirdgirl wrote:hi, well, im melissa and i guess there's something wrong with me, i mean corpses arouses me, i don't know if i am a necrophile, i like snuff videos like 3 guys 1 hammer,etc and i love when a person is being murdered i mean, the struggling and the screams, it arouses me so much, but i know it's wrong and i dont know what to do, i dont want to be this way, but i can't help it, people say that im sick in the head and im starting to believe them i mean, this isn't normal right?

Hey and welcome Melissa.

You should explore Sadism, there is so many ways you can enjoy Your kinks withouth actually killing someone. I like the same Things, and blood and mutilations, on others. I skype With a guy that nail and cut his Dick for me, i get some of my quota from that. Violent Movies can be a good substitute for murder.
Have you ever used Fetlife? I found my blood guy there, also i have gotten all kinds of offers, like shooting, killing, stabbing or skinning People. Obviously i not kill People, and i have a surgeon i ask advice from when in doubt. there was a situation With a guy that wanted me to skin his Dick, but the risk of him dying as a result was really high, even in a sterile setting, so i had to skip it, i regret i said no, but Yeah...

You are most welcome to PM me about anything.

Thanks Contro.

I've never really been one who gives a monkey's for societal conditioning and norms, and my levels of 'shame', if that's the right word, are entirely appropriate to who and what I am.

I think we have to recognise that these desires are, by their very nature, potentially harmful, but my point to the OP is that a the presence of a paraphilia or a fetish does not mean that an individual is actually dangerous, and should not be a reason to be ashamed of oneself on its own.

Most paraphiles are as decent as the next human, but sadly, many of us have to live through years of shame and anguish before we realise that.

Graveyard76 wrote:I've never really been one who gives a monkey's for societal conditioning and norms, and my levels of 'shame', if that's the right word, are entirely appropriate to who and what I am.

Shame is never appropriate, my friend. Shame is feeling bad about oneself for being who they are, because they have been lead to believe that they're bad. What's wrong with pleasuring oneself at the expense of others? You do it all the time without realizing it, when you buy yourself a treat instead of donating money to charity for people who could use it a lot more, right?

It's okay to be selfish. The more selfless a person is, the more weak they become because they aren't looking after themselves enough. Dominance is a very natural human desire.

I think we have to recognise that these desires are, by their very nature, potentially harmful

Right and I am in no way advocating deviant sexual behavior.

Most paraphiles are as decent as the next human, but sadly, many of us have to live through years of shame and anguish before we realise that.

Mhm. Acceptance of oneself is key for everything, really. Makes us grow as people.

I try to remember that every time I have a desire that I feel bad about, it's because my moral compass is kicking in and making me think about the other person. I've learned to ignore that "inner voice" while in fantasy mode, because I've rationalized to myself that it's biological and that it doesn't hurt anyone. As long as I'm only thinking about hurting people, I can remain guilt free because my guilt is associated with causing actual pain, not imagined. However, because most people aren't so in-tune with themselves, they like to pretend to be better than their urges and many people suppress them. Guilt causes a lot of problems for a lot of people and many times, it isn't necessary. Actually, it never is, no matter what.

The next step is realizing that if you can fantasize to something and not feel guilty, what's the difference between that and actually doing it? And by that I mean, what makes it so much worse? Nothing. Our urges don't want us to suppress them, they want us to express them. So why not express them? Well, because our consciences tell us that it's "wrong." So in other words, it's wrong to be natural. When you logically accept that realization and don't try to run from it, you face who you really are and it's scary. It also feels really good though and you realize that there's really no need to hold back anymore, at least emotionally... Logically, you are still aware of legal and social ramifications, which would make your life more difficult.

Our more developed prefrontal cortexes (when compared to other animals) help us in many ways, but they can also be a pain in the ass when they question our primitive but still very present desires. Sometimes, you just have to remind yourself that it's "primitive time" and tell it to shut up.