desperate to be gang raped, what is wrong w me?

Just wanted to point out something on STDs (since it came up twice in this thread). I must say as a disclaimer that my suggestion that adult theater sex is a satisfying way to address a REAL rape fetish indeed runs a risk of STDs. When I used the word "safe" I was referring to safe from violence, since adult theater troll rape for orgasm, not violence. And they climax very quickly, usually right on first penetration, some even before they penetrate. However, all unprotected intercourse (which is what you'd have to allow to satisfy this craving) runs risk.

But allow me to put that risk into perspective. I have been involved in adult theater sex since age 17 (I'm now 54). That's 37 years. I go about 20 times a year. That's 740 episodes. On a typical episode I will get violated by about 30 males, about 20 of whom will be able to deposit their orgasm in the vagina. And of those 20, about half of them will come back for "seconds". The average male ejaculation emits about 6 mL of semen. Thus, in my 720 episodes over 37 years, my body has absorbed about 130 liters of anonymous unprotected rapist troll semen in the darkness of adult theaters.

That's about 34 gallons, and to this day, I have never caught a single STD. I do, however, know a man who became paraplegic playing rugby. I know a man who broke his back in a motorcycle accident. And I knew a woman who was killed white-water rafting. Yet, no one will ever criticize these recreational activities for their risks ... but recreational sex? I wonder why.

Dear lord i thought i heard it all...nevermind me...carry on. Im not judging.

@papergirl. Do you have a normal healthy relationship though?

Papergirl wrote:Just wanted to point out something on STDs (since it came up twice in this thread). I must say as a disclaimer that my suggestion that adult theater sex is a satisfying way to address a REAL rape fetish indeed runs a risk of STDs. When I used the word "safe" I was referring to safe from violence, since adult theater troll rape for orgasm, not violence. And they climax very quickly, usually right on first penetration, some even before they penetrate. However, all unprotected intercourse (which is what you'd have to allow to satisfy this craving) runs risk.

But allow me to put that risk into perspective. I have been involved in adult theater sex since age 17 (I'm now 54). That's 37 years. I go about 20 times a year. That's 740 episodes. On a typical episode I will get violated by about 30 males, about 20 of whom will be able to deposit their orgasm in the vagina. And of those 20, about half of them will come back for "seconds". The average male ejaculation emits about 6 mL of semen. Thus, in my 720 episodes over 37 years, my body has absorbed about 130 liters of anonymous unprotected rapist troll semen in the darkness of adult theaters.

That's about 34 gallons, and to this day, I have never caught a single STD. I do, however, know a man who became paraplegic playing rugby. I know a man who broke his back in a motorcycle accident. And I knew a woman who was killed white-water rafting. Yet, no one will ever criticize these recreational activities for their risks ... but recreational sex? I wonder why.

This is seriously disturbing....and I'm not close minded when it comes to sex....

Are you serious, or is this a joke/exaggeration?

Elkahn - Certainly not a joke, and if anything, an understatement. Although it is fringe sexual activity in the wider scheme of alternative sex, it is not uncommon in a certain sector of the swinger community. I know many other women who are into this paraphilia, and some of these women are much more prolific than I. It is done typically in adult theaters (which, by the way, no one goes to for the movie), but there are other venues. In the city in which I live, there are three women (and couples) friendly adult theaters. One of them even has couches and a gloryhole (look that up if you don't know what it is). And this activity can also be done outdoors in so-called "dogging" sites (nothing to do with dogs). There are also so-called "rape rooms", essentially an adult theater without the movie (a cavernous pitch-black dark room with beanbag chairs and couches strewn around). We have one in my city, and it is very popular with women in this scene. They hold organized "events" on select Sunday afternoons. I will be there this coming Sunday, in fact.

Elkahn, just as a matter of etiquette - next time you hear about a sexual activity with which you are not familiar, look it up and learn about it before you refer to it as a "joke". Sex may be recreation, but it's never a joke.

I just passed a gang of 5 rowdy youths who were aggressive to me on the way to the 24hr supermarket. They were slightly aggressive at me. They entered the shop then I did. I was headed in the opposite direction to where they came from, but I was tempted to go and loiter in thier direction (where it is dark also). I imagined them gang raping me. But they were aggressive enough they probably would have just kick the $#%^ out of me.

But to be gang raped by 5 youths. I crave that.

Are there mainly females frequented porno theatres where a man could get violated?

I agree Elkan. It is seriously disturbing. If you read papergirl's story, you will see this is the result of being terribly abused as a little girl. Any way you look at it, the abuse is continuing on into adulthood, and the victims still have no way of stopping it.

Papergirl has been calm, understanding and factual and all some of us can do is call her sexual experiences disturbing and hope she is joking. That's super supportive guys. Wasn't there a discussion on another thread about even if you don't understand something or don't support it that maybe you should keep that to yourself and stay supportive and constructive?

I do appreciate everyone’s comments, even those with which I disagree. And yes, my current sexual proclivities stem from one summer when I was sexually exploited by a close relative. And yes, I guess you can use the word “abused”, although I don’t feel that way. However, my current sexual outlets satisfy me. I find this kind of sexual recreation (which has a vulgar name that I don’t particularly like, and will refer to simply as “CS”) to be exciting and fulfilling.

My brain doesn’t connect sex and love. I have never had a normal sex life, and never will. Agreed that my romantic dysfunctions are without doubt due to that summer at age 9, but at this point that’s irrelevant in any way beyond academic interest. What is relevant is the choice I’m faced with – either indulge in CS and enjoy what I have, or crave an intangible and be perpetually frustrated.

The OP is a young woman who has expressed a desperate (her word) craving to be gang raped. Her post was worded in such a way that it seems she is going to eventually put herself in a dangerous situation to indulge her craving. CS may satisfy her cravings in a safe and (semi) legal way. I know her cravings first hand, and I assure her she is not alone.

I can understand how some folks may find CS “disturbing”. But allow me to remind you that 50 years ago homosexuality was “disturbing”. Ten years ago group sex was disturbing. Today swinger clubs and sex parties are practically part of the mainstream, and gay life is held in very high regard. As I said, this activity has a colloquial name that I find repugnant (and a misnomer). I referred to it here by its initials “CS”. In fact, many women don’t like the official name, and it is starting to become known as “this thing of ours”. I’m not sure if there is a clinical name for the paraphilia. And, as there appears to be a lot of curiosity about it, I will post an expose of the CS paraphilia, and hopefully you’ll find it less (or perhaps even more) disturbing. But more importantly, perhaps offer some insight for women like the OP.