For boy lovers

cumulusjames wrote:There is nothing there you could not do and enjoy with someone over 18. So your preference for younger boys must be emotional and psychological.

Can the same not be said for anyone with a sexual preference? or is that the nature vs. nurture debate

I'd like to point out again that sexual desire is not based purely on what you can do with whom.

Theoretically, receiving oral sex from a man would feel too different from a lady but it conceptually grosses me out. No one can tell me that this is hegemonic heteronormativity constraining my thoughts. I'm a pro-contact pedophile for crying out loud.

Some people just like some things while not liking others like how I love rosemary but hate dill.

-- Thu Jan 15, 2015 10:00 am --

I'm fascinated by this theory that male boy lovers are actually homosexuals in such denial of their sexuality that they only allow themselves to desire the males that are more physiologically female, however, I'm not quite convinced by it.

If one was in denial about their homosexuality wouldn't acknowledging an affinity for boys be just be admitting it and if someone was ashamed of one alternative sexuality why would they be more willing to acknowledge another one?

I should think a repressed homosexuality would be far more likely to outlet themselves with masculine women, transsexuals or maybe heterosexual acts than can be performed also by 2 men. Maybe they would look at straight pornography that featured a lot of male nudity.

Maligan12 wrote:I'd like to point out again that sexual desire is not based purely on what you can do with whom.

Theoretically, receiving oral sex from a man would feel too different from a lady but it conceptually grosses me out. No one can tell me that this is hegemonic heteronormativity constraining my thoughts. I'm a pro-contact pedophile for crying out loud.

Some people just like some things while not liking others like how I love rosemary but hate dill.

This is kind of what I was trying to say early on. It is true you can get the same sexual activities from an 11 year old boy or an 11 year old girl as you would from their adult counterparts. Doesn't mean the person with that attraction can just go oh yeah you're right, and suddenly turn to the adult version of that gender. I'm fairly certain I wasn't born this way and that my problem is emotional and/or psychological. I would really love to know what the cause is specifically though.

Mustelidae wrote:

cumulusjames wrote:

Mustelidae wrote:Hahaha. Well I'd prefer much closer to 5ft and maybe a bit smaller. I thought I was thinking more in features rather than age? It's just that those features are expressed more often in that age range.

The 23 yr old I slept with the other day was 5ft 2. He was firm and smooth and had a great bum, his legs has just a whisp of hair, but nothing too much. You could not see yourself in that situation? Have a look at the porn star mike18 - does he do anything for you?

I googled him. I felt very uncomfortable and grossed out. Then I felt like I was about to cry. Should he turn me on? Should he not? Does he subconsciously and this reaction is me denying that fact?

Something just occurred to me - Mike18 has not been 18 for a number of years. I think that site started in the mid to late 2000's. So perhaps you were looking at a 25 yr old Mike 18. You have to see his earliest stuff to get what I mean. He had the physique of one of the boys I went with at school, which is probably why I am drawn to him. We were 14 at the time, so if you could be attracted to that, there would be a hope of some sort of "desensitization" to bring you up to legal boys (which in my country is 16, but 18 for porn). I really think you are repressing homosexuality, which is something you are going to come to regret if one day you come to that realization.

I had another look. I'm fairly certain I was looking at him at 18. Still turns me off quite a bit. Like I've said I don't know the extent of my attraction. Maybe there is a difference between fantasy and seeing the real thing. Perhaps I've been kidding myself. Maybe this is some half-hearted attempt to deal with my lack of confidence with attractive women. Or maybe he still doesn't look 'under-developed' enough for me.

Mustelidae wrote:I had another look. I'm fairly certain I was looking at him at 18. Still turns me off quite a bit. Like I've said I don't know the extent of my attraction. Maybe there is a difference between fantasy and seeing the real thing. Perhaps I've been kidding myself. Maybe this is some half-hearted attempt to deal with my lack of confidence with attractive women. Or maybe he still doesn't look 'under-developed' enough for me.

You should look again. He really looks 14 - 16 in his earliest stuff. The thing is, if you can't be turned on by him, then EVERYTHING about your attractions is age, not beauty. That has to point to emotional not sexual issues?

But does that mean that the physical features I am attracted to are just a placebo effect if I know their age? If I was attracted to someone I didn't know was 16 or 18 and found out later, would I suddenly not find them attractive?

Mustelidae wrote:But does that mean that the physical features I am attracted to are just a placebo effect if I know their age? If I was attracted to someone I didn't know was 16 or 18 and found out later, would I suddenly not find them attractive?

The 23 yr old I ###$ the other night had incredibly youthful skin, he was 5' 2". His body was all the dimensions of a 14 - 16 yr old. I have ###$ a 16 yr old and he was sexier. Had I took a picture of him and airbrushed out any signs of stubble and told you he was 14, you would have believed it. Which I think would have turned you on. So for me, you are going for age not looks. Which means you are almost certainly bi or gay, but the reason you fixate on age must be some unresolved psychological issue.

As an example I was lonely and had no friends when I was 14. So any longing for 14 yr olds I ever had might be down to a longing for friends which never left me.

What makes you say I'm fixated on age?

James there is no one answer fits all, things will be different for everyone even though at times they may seem like the same situations.

For me my emotional state, low self esteem, gay experiences at a young age, never having the courage to get it on with girls even though I liked them etc etc.

So yes in my case I believe my problems have been due to a number of things that made me feel like I could only be happy with a boy as I would feel emotionally at the same level as them but yet girls the same age was a no go area for me. Yet long for a heterosexual relationship now more than ever.

I also care a great deal about kids and that is something I can't change regardless of their sex, so that also goes against what I was. Viewing.

I would not say the age of the person was important it was certainly more their features and how they looked, there were some boys that just did nothing for me that I saw. So I would say it was mostly a certain type of boy and that could extend to any age if they looked youthful.

But one of the things I learnt on my course was that I viewed the things I did because they reminded me and took me back to time that was pleasurable and a happier time.

The other thing to remember something being wrong or taboo can be a big turn on for some people, it can be more about the taboo element that manifests in the age of the subject that makes it seems much more eexciting. The exact reason why porn used people dressed in school uniforms and suchlike. Why do some people get so turned on by someone in a particular uniform?