Came to terms that I am a pedophile

I am a male in my 30s who is exclusively attracted to boys between ages 7-13. I am not attracted to men, women or girls. I think the reason why it took me so long to come to terms with my sexuality is because when I see pedophiles, I don't see me. I see molesters and/or men who are into girls and/or men who will molest anything. I have never met another male who was just into boys. The closest was meeting a guy who insisted he wasn't a pedophile but just a gay guy who liked young boys. He was one of those nutjob gay rights 'activists.' Anyways, I often wondered where all the guys who are just into boys are. Apparently we are a minority within a minority.

I spent a lot of time understanding why I am sexually attracted to boys ages 7-13. I think a part of it is growing up without friends due to a lot of reasons so when I am around boys, I feel like I am experiencing things that I missed out on. Also I was physically and emotionally abused as a kid and still carry feelings of low self-esteem. I don't feel like adults will like me because they can see that I am not likeable or have anything to offer them.

I do spent a lot of time with boys. When I am with them, I am not sexually attracted to them. I feel like once a bond is formed, then I lose interest. I am attracted to boys who I don't know. So when I am in a locker room, I am attracted to the naked boy who I don't know but not the boy who routine cuddles with me. In fact, I don't even like having boys on me if I know them because I am a germophobe LOL.

I am not sure what to do next. I thought about seeing a psychologist after I can find a decent job that involve no boys. Even then, I don't hold out much hope is being 'cured.' I just wish that I knew other guys like me.

hi, pleased to meet you. Im a boylover like yourself & I've learned to accept it. This is the best advice I can give you is to accept yourself and be honest about who you are self acceptance is most important since we must accept ourselves before others can accept us,to hide from it will be hiding from yourself & you will never find happiness. You don't need to be "cured" because you're not "sick" there's nothing wrong with us, we simply have a sexual orientation that is socially & culturally unacceptable. Cultural & Social attitudes toward minor attracted people are parallel with attitudes toward homosexuality which have inproved significantly over the past 50 years or so. Homosexuality is not Paedophilia but paedophilia is significantly homosexual. The NAMBLA movement which was founded by David Thorstad is an offshoot of the Gay rights movement and was supported by Harry Hay who consistently advocated the inclusion of NAMBLA in gay pride marches. Homosexuality was considered a Paraphilia until 1973 when it gained recognition as a sexual orientation, prior to that gay unions were not legal under sodomy laws which were eventually repealed state by state and removed from the books altogether in 2003. Dont beat yourself up, by doing so you empower the ignorant, bigoted,judgmental haters.

eproctophiliac68 wrote:hi, pleased to meet you. Im a boylover like yourself & I've learned to accept it. This is the best advice I can give you is to accept yourself and be honest about who you are self acceptance is most important since we must accept ourselves before others can accept us,to hide from it will be hiding from yourself & you will never find happiness. You don't need to be "cured" because you're not "sick" there's nothing wrong with us, we simply have a sexual orientation that is socially & culturally unacceptable. Cultural & Social attitudes toward minor attracted people are parallel with attitudes toward homosexuality which have inproved significantly over the past 50 years or so. Homosexuality is not Paedophilia but paedophilia is significantly homosexual. The NAMBLA movement which was founded by David Thorstad is an offshoot of the Gay rights movement and was supported by Harry Hay who consistently advocated the inclusion of NAMBLA in gay pride marches. Homosexuality was considered a Paraphilia until 1973 when it gained recognition as a sexual orientation, prior to that gay unions were not legal under sodomy laws which were eventually repealed state by state and removed from the books altogether in 2003. Dont beat yourself up, by doing so you empower the ignorant, bigoted,judgmental haters.

I would not compare the gay rights movement with pedophilia. As someone who works with many gay people, I can tell you that gays hate pedophiles as much as straight people do. You will never see Neil Patrick Harris or Ellen DeGeneres sticking up for pedophiles. I don't blame them.
Furthermore, all those pedophile 'activists' are all talk and no action. They're sort of like those terrorist leaders who tell others to fly planes into buildings but would never do the same because that would be ######6 crazy. How many men have openly declared that they are boylovers by choice in the last five years? And I don't mean sex offenders or people who were arrested. Therefore, I disagree with you about society becoming more accepting of pedophiles. I would say it's been the opposite. There is no way a group of boylovers would ever be allowed to partake in a gay parade in 2014 like they did 30 years ago.

congrats on coming out man first step and all

i wouldn't cuddle with kids tho, apart from the mob that would form if anyone found out about your orientation, it just seems like it's too close you know, thats just my 2 cents tho, some people can control their situation and some have trouble.

if your looking for the next step, i'd say do a bunch of research but be careful theres alot of misleading stuff out there, just keep in mind that it is an orientation and sexual contact always causes harm(in one way or another)

ive spent months researching like crazy when i came out so if you have any questions or just need someone to talk to drop me a message

stay strong man

siphon wrote:congrats on coming out man first step and all

i wouldn't cuddle with kids tho, apart from the mob that would form if anyone found out about your orientation, it just seems like it's too close you know, thats just my 2 cents tho, some people can control their situation and some have trouble.

if your looking for the next step, i'd say do a bunch of research but be careful theres alot of misleading stuff out there, just keep in mind that it is an orientation and sexual contact always causes harm(in one way or another)

ive spent months researching like crazy when i came out so if you have any questions or just need someone to talk to drop me a message

stay strong man

I know being a pedo and cuddling with boys sounds like a bad idea but I feel like I look weird if I reject or act uncomfortable with a child who displays affection towards me. I looked into research but most, if not all, is based on sex offenders and men who are into girls. Obviously that does not apply to me.

jmorgan wrote:Furthermore, all those pedophile 'activists' are all talk and no action. They're sort of like those terrorist leaders who tell others to fly planes into buildings but would never do the same because that would be ######6 crazy.

What good would it do for me to strap on a suicide vest and murder a bunch of randoms? No, seriously, you explain to me how that will make the world a better place for our kind and I'll gather the materials for the explosives this afternoon.

This is what pisses me off about everyone who goes on this "you're all talk and no action" #######4. You haven't even started considering how we get from point A to point B, what the social pre-requisites are for improving our situation. No, we must be manly men rushing to take decisive action, in the absence of any indication whatsoever that said action is going to help anything.

But hey, you've clearly thought this through, so you go ahead and explain to me what non-talk "action" looks like.

jmorgan wrote:How many men have openly declared that they are boylovers by choice in the last five years? And I don't mean sex offenders or people who were arrested.

Funny, that looks an awful lot like "talk" to me. I thought that was the sort of thing you held in contempt, just speaking out on the issue is what those cowardly terrorist leaders do, not like the manly suicide bombers who take "action".

But I'm being unfair. Surely you've thought this through far better than I and all the other inefectual pedophile activists have. So you tell me, good sir, how does one openly declare such in a way that meets your standards? Do they need to have gone on the talk show circut? That would require the talk show hosts and producers approving it and using their efforts to amplify the speech of the would-be pedophile activist, and they've collectively adopted a policy of silencing us some time ago. So, obviously that isn't how one comes out. Maybe we just have to do something so hilariously evil they'll be forced to talk about us like those noble souls who fly planes into buildings for their cause. Surely that will be the first step towards them recognizing us as people, right?

jmorgan wrote:Therefore, I disagree with you about society becoming more accepting of pedophiles. I would say it's been the opposite. There is no way a group of boylovers would ever be allowed to partake in a gay parade in 2014 like they did 30 years ago.

Since you've studied the histories so carefully, you obviously know what changed so it would be patronizing for me to go into detail. Clearly a few mass murders is all it'll take to get us back on track. It'll have nothing to do with that namby-pamby "talk" that I've been doing.

Persuading people on an individual basis; entering hostile social groups and transforming them so that pedophile=/=child molester is not only accepted fact, but considered so obvious that the culture sustains the messaging even in my absence; convincing my fellow pedophiles that they deserve better, and aren't the scum this culture has taught them they are from birth. All of that's just meaningless "talk". What I really should've done if I wanted to make the world a better place is kill a bunch of people, then die without ever convincing anyone of anything.

YouthRightsRadical wrote:

jmorgan wrote:Furthermore, all those pedophile 'activists' are all talk and no action. They're sort of like those terrorist leaders who tell others to fly planes into buildings but would never do the same because that would be ######6 crazy.

What good would it do for me to strap on a suicide vest and murder a bunch of randoms? No, seriously, you explain to me how that will make the world a better place for our kind and I'll gather the materials for the explosives this afternoon.

This is what pisses me off about everyone who goes on this "you're all talk and no action" #######4. You haven't even started considering how we get from point A to point B, what the social pre-requisites are for improving our situation. No, we must be manly men rushing to take decisive action, in the absence of any indication whatsoever that said action is going to help anything.

But hey, you've clearly thought this through, so you go ahead and explain to me what non-talk "action" looks like.

jmorgan wrote:How many men have openly declared that they are boylovers by choice in the last five years? And I don't mean sex offenders or people who were arrested.

Funny, that looks an awful lot like "talk" to me. I thought that was the sort of thing you held in contempt, just speaking out on the issue is what those cowardly terrorist leaders do, not like the manly suicide bombers who take "action".

But I'm being unfair. Surely you've thought this through far better than I and all the other inefectual pedophile activists have. So you tell me, good sir, how does one openly declare such in a way that meets your standards? Do they need to have gone on the talk show circut? That would require the talk show hosts and producers approving it and using their efforts to amplify the speech of the would-be pedophile activist, and they've collectively adopted a policy of silencing us some time ago. So, obviously that isn't how one comes out. Maybe we just have to do something so hilariously evil they'll be forced to talk about us like those noble souls who fly planes into buildings for their cause. Surely that will be the first step towards them recognizing us as people, right?

jmorgan wrote:Therefore, I disagree with you about society becoming more accepting of pedophiles. I would say it's been the opposite. There is no way a group of boylovers would ever be allowed to partake in a gay parade in 2014 like they did 30 years ago.

Since you've studied the histories so carefully, you obviously know what changed so it would be patronizing for me to go into detail. Clearly a few mass murders is all it'll take to get us back on track. It'll have nothing to do with that namby-pamby "talk" that I've been doing.

Persuading people on an individual basis; entering hostile social groups and transforming them so that pedophile=/=child molester is not only accepted fact, but considered so obvious that the culture sustains the messaging even in my absence; convincing my fellow pedophiles that they deserve better, and aren't the scum this culture has taught them they are from birth. All of that's just meaningless "talk". What I really should've done if I wanted to make the world a better place is kill a bunch of people, then die without ever convincing anyone of anything.

Then you can post your real name and lead the way.

Post it where? Here? Come now, my genius friend, you need to spell out your plan for us poor idiots who lack your forethought.

While I applaud your seeming ambition, I must ask just in what capacity you believe we should act. We can't very well yell on the street corners, "Hey everyone! I'm a boylovin' pedophile. Who's with me!" One might as well hoist a bulls-eye on their back and insult a bunch of bikers. I agree with you that we can do more to repel the hysteria, but anything on the order of a terrorist attack is both counterproductive and futile, besides being morally reprehensible. It would "verify" everything our enemies say about us. But if you really want to make progress in this area of society's theoretical "acceptance " of pedophilia, I suggest hooking up with certain affluent elements of the higher echelons who have hidden agendas. However, that is easier said than done. First of all, they're going to be suspicious. Second of all, how will you find them? Third of all, you'll draw attention to yourself in the meantime, unless you already have connections. If you have any insight into all of this, I'm all ears.
Personally, I believe that there are already forces at work in the societal hierarchy attempting to advance just such an agenda, but their primary strategies (those of attrition and reverse psychology) are likely having the opposite effect. It is one of the things about American culture that really pisses me off.

YouthRightsRadical wrote:Post it where? Here? Come now, my genius friend, you need to spell out your plan for us poor idiots who lack your forethought.

Where did I say that I wanted to be a youth rights radical? That's you.