Sadomasochism, necrophilia and hematophilia *lil update*

Hello! ^^ It's been a while since I've been here, to be honest life has just been bloody hectic as of late and only now am I beginning to catch up. I posted about my sadism, masochism, necrophilia and hematophilia last time and received some lovely responses, I appreciate them all, thank you. Sometimes you just need someone who understands, it can be pretty lonely out there.

Since then I've actually told two friends about these paraphilias and they were both very accepting, if not intrigued. The cute part was that one began sending photos of corpses to me, haha. :b It's great to be able to talk openly with select people about this and for them to not be freaked out or disgusted by it. One of my worries before was that if my family or friends knew, they wouldn't want to know me, and I still think that of most of them. But if I can decide who knows and trust those people, it helps.

You guys also made me become more okay with these thoughts, they don't bother me so much anymore. They are still there and will remain there and I do sometimes feel sick, but I wouldn't harm anyone and that's all that matters. I also decided it's probably best to stay clear of relationships if I can help it because there is no way that I could be satisfied without causing serious harm and/or death to my partner and I don't want to do that.

*yawn* Sleepy now, bedtime. When I get so tired I end up getting all emotional and weird and chu don't that. I'll stay around these forums and contribute when I can but I'm just very busy right now there's a lot going on.. aha, I just wanted to say thanks for being there really. ^.^

Greetings, luksik! Glad to hear you're doing well. I'm actually quite curious about how you went about telling these two friends, especially since it went over so decently. I hate always having to be secretive, but am (just as you probably were/are) fearful of what they would think. How did you select which friends, and how did you go about telling them? I'm glad it turned out all right!

TheHumanBeing wrote:Greetings, luksik! Glad to hear you're doing well. I'm actually quite curious about how you went about telling these two friends, especially since it went over so decently. I hate always having to be secretive, but am (just as you probably were/are) fearful of what they would think. How did you select which friends, and how did you go about telling them? I'm glad it turned out all right!

Hello human ^.^ I hate being so secretive too and still have to be, it's something that you can't just tell everyone unless you plan on losing most of them, or having them act differently around you. It's not something people really need to know either but I don't like lying when it comes up, most folk just think I'm asexual because I avoid talking about things like that usually. I never forward planned to telling these friends but the topic was brought to necrophilia and that allowed me to hear their opinions on it which were very positive. So I just casually told them that I'm a necrophile. It was very easy to say to them and after admitting that just thought ###$ it and told them about everything else too. I trust them not to tell anyone and keep it between us. Their reactions were a bit shocked at first but mostly they just wanted to ask questions and everything was fine, they treat me no differently with the exeptions of the sexy photos and I think it might've somehow brought us closer together, probably because I'm not hiding with them anymore!

So as for selecting who to tell, bring the paraphilia into conversation and listen to what they think about it before saying. That lets you judge how they'll react while keeping yourself distant. Even if it's negative that doesn't mean they won't accept you, most people haven't properly thought about these things and have misconceptions, use this mainly to find out if they are violently opposed to it. If that is the case I would say stay clear of telling them obviously. You also must trust this person completely and know that they won't use it against you/blackmail or tell other people, so a very good friend, not necessarily someone you've known forever, just someone who is trustworthy, loyal and open to new ideas. I don't know your friends so you must determine this for yourself. Be sure of this person though, you don't want to risk them telling everyone, that can cause you so much trouble!

How to go about telling them.. don't make a big deal about it. I never thought it through beforehand but that worked for me. Truthfully answer any questions they have and don't be upset if they say something that seems offensive to you, most people don't ever really count on being told something like this and they might be taken back by it.

Are you planning on telling someone?

Thank you for the detailed answer! I'm not really planning on telling a specific person, but it's an idea I've considered in the past. I just can't imagine going my whole life without telling anyone. It builds on you after a while. A few people I've considered, but I'm also really paranoid so that's a massive hold-back.