Living with Paedophilia

I'm tired of hearing people - including paedophiles - stating that they think paedophiles should get therapy for their thoughts.

Sexual fantasies about children can't be repressed, just as fantasies about same-gender (or opposite-gender) people can't be repressed. They tried to "cure" gay people and it didn't work.

The only thing that paedophiles need to be aware of is that acting on those fantasies by having sex with children is wrong. One doesn't need a therapist to know that.

There's a good book about sexual fantasies and I wrote an article about it, here - http://anu.nfshost.com/2007/understanding-fantasy

You can read the Times Online review here - http://women.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life ... l&offset=0

I hope that people who have an attraction to children will realise that their attraction is not "wrong" unless it is acted upon, and that having such an attraction does not make you likely to actually engage in sexual activities with children. Humans have control over their urges, regardless of who they're attracted to.

mindyou wrote:Yes, I see a sixteen year old also as a kid. Regardless all the stories pedophilians tell among eachother, no, they don't ask freely for sex with an adult.

Sorry, but as a 17 year old I can say this is #######4.

And exclusive pedophiles are not attracted to post-pubescents.

BLueRibbon wrote:I'm tired of hearing people - including paedophiles - stating that they think paedophiles should get therapy for their thoughts.

Sexual fantasies about children can't be repressed, just as fantasies about same-gender (or opposite-gender) people can't be repressed. They tried to "cure" gay people and it didn't work.

The only thing that paedophiles need to be aware of is that acting on those fantasies by having sex with children is wrong. One doesn't need a therapist to know that.

There's a good book about sexual fantasies and I wrote an article about it, here - http://anu.nfshost.com/2007/understanding-fantasy

You can read the Times Online review here - http://women.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life ... l&offset=0

I hope that people who have an attraction to children will realise that their attraction is not "wrong" unless it is acted upon, and that having such an attraction does not make you likely to actually engage in sexual activities with children. Humans have control over their urges, regardless of who they're attracted to.

Just for the record, I never said anything about pedophiles repressing their thoughts. Repression of the thoughts is probably the worst thing anybody can do. But that's exactly why I advocate getting professional help. Talking about the issue with somebody, telling somebody about it and not holding it in, releases a lot of the burden, and can start the path to recovery. And getting insight from an outside source you can trust can give you new ideas on how to handle the thoughts and how to be sure you'll never act on them. Getting some kind of professional help, even if it's just to tell another real person in a safe environment that you're a pedophile, is a million times better than constantly repressing the issue and keeping it to yourself. Like with any other mental illness as well, that just causes it to compound and worsen over time.

I have tried so hard in the past to try and find a way to cure my pedosexuality by reading books on how I could do it and what I could do. I have realized that the only true way to get help is to actually commit a crime against a child and I just can't do that and won't. So I have come to just realize that this is who I am. If I come to the point where I do feel like I am going to molest a child I will turn myself into the police and tell them what I am and what I was about to do. Some of you may think that is bs but that is what I would do. Not all pedophiles are sick monsters that should be put away in prison for the rest of our lives. I just have learned over the years to control my lusts and desires and I just watch but do not touch.

Hi Blben,
I don't want to impose but I had a thought when reading your post...

If I come to the point where I do feel like I am going to molest a child I will turn myself into the police and tell them what I am and what I was about to do.

Not that I think your intensons are wrong, I can see you know how bad it is to molest a child, BUT can the police arrest you for somthing you haven't done?
It's just a thought I don't mean to be rude or anything

Hey anonymous112

I totally am cool with you saying that and I don't think you are imposing at all. I think that if I were to the point of where I thought that I was going to molest a child I would turn myself into the local police and tell them what I was thinking about doing and tell them that I am a pedophile and I am sure something will happen that would prevent me from acting out sexually with a child. Thank God I am not in that situation right now and I have a good feeling that I won't. I just know that I couldn't live with myself if I actually were sexual with a child. It would just kill me inside.