I don't want to be a zoophile/pedophile...*TRIGGER WARNING*

Hi all,

I am new to this forum and I just wanted some support.

First, I want to talk about zoophilia.

I've spent most of my life around animals; dogs and cats, mostly. I worked with animals as a bather and previous to that a kennel worker. I never had sexual thoughts about them at all.

It wasn't til several years ago that I started noticing my attraction to dogs. I had access to different types of dogs, and I'm not going to say how to protect my identity. I was usually around spayed/neutered dogs, but a few unaltered dogs came in my living situation. It was then that I had the first thought in my head that I was attracted. It started with voices in my head telling me to touch them[I have schizoaffective disorder], and once I touched an unaltered male dog, and got seriously aroused by it, I knew this was not normal. I thought that once I stopped hearing voices I would no longer have a longing to touch dogs. Well, that never happened. I touched a few female dogs without hearing any voices telling me to do that, and watched porn featuring humans being sexual with dogs and horses.

Eventually, I knew I had to stop watching the porn and fantasizing about them. I felt awful that I touched the dogs that came into my care and I feel like a monster. The sexual thoughts went away for a while, but now they are back.

I don't live with any animals, so I'm not worried about touching them inappropriately, but I can't get the thoughts out of my head. I find male dogs especially arousing. I haven't looked at animal porn yet, but I feel like it's only a matter of time before I cave in.

The most frustrating about this is that I LOVE animals and used to want a career with them. I feel like I'll never be able to own my own dog because I might get aroused by it. These thoughts are unwanted, and I am hesitant to bring them up with my therapist. He knows that I inappropriately touched a dog before, but I don't think he realizes how serious it is.

These thoughts are consuming me. I don't want to hurt animals.

Next, are my thoughts about young children.

I never had sexual thoughts about children until I started hearing voices. Like with the thoughts about animals, I thought they would dissipate after I stopped hearing voices. Not the case. I have young cousins who I frequently dream about molesting them. I have never looked at child porn, but I have fantasized about touching male children. I find myself looking at young girls at the beach, the way their bathing suits cling to them, and I find myself being aroused. I mostly have these thoughts about girls and boys that are pre puberty.

Should I tell my therapist about these thoughts? Am I crazy? Will these thoughts ever go away?

Am I a zoophile? Am I a pedophile?

-L

The zoophilic thoughts at least are probably safe to tell your therapist, especially if the therapist already knows you've acted on those feelings before.

As to the pedophilic thoughts, I don't think it's a problem in and of itself. If they're bothering you, I'd suggest talking to your therapist about their confidentiality policy. Ask them at what point they'd need to report you to someone, and then make your judgement about whether to bring up these urges with them.

Personally I don't see whats wrong with having sex with animals aslong as they show you they want it too , I'm shure there are thousands of reasons why not too and some idiot will come up and say omg your disgusting ,etc when really it's been happening since ######6 ages ago so please spare us all the garbage.

Why not buy dildos of animals if you can't cope with the real thing , I can understand why you wouldn't in which case don't it's totally up too you by the way I like horses a lot : )