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should I blame my pedophilia for this?

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Re: should I blame my pedophilia for this?

Postby lifelongthing » Mon Dec 02, 2013 2:01 pm

I'm sorry you experienced being abused. This however does not mean you can blame your pedophilia for your actions. I'm a little confused because you ask "Should I blame my pedophilia for this?" yet when I explain to you why I think you should not, your argument is that you were abused or you had experienced x y z which is not entirely related to your pedophilia.

An anger problem or a problem with getting involved in relationships that are unhealthy or dangerous is something to take seriously. Putting yourself in danger is not something you deserve. You deserve a good, healthy life where you can have relationships (friendships or otherwise) where you have healthy boundaries and experience safety.

However finding one thing and blaming it on that seems a bit unhealthy to me as you need to own and take responsibility for your own behavior, no matter what basis you made the choices on. Only you can decide how to react, only you can decide to put your safety first, only you can stand up and say "I will not accept this sort of behavior" and set healthy boundaries (or contact law enforcement when necessary).

As I said I talked to my therapist about a few things like that...she did not consider it pathological.

You say here you have not told her the whole story, you did not tell her about all the incidences. Being completely open about all experiences pertaining to what you are talking to her about (be that this or something else) you may find she is better able to help you figure out what she can do to help you best.

I hope you can in time find someone who can help you or that you find healing on your own. Best of luck.
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