Paraphilia? True or False?

I have known a guy couple of weeks ago. He is nice and quite a good catch for someone like me who wants to settle down. We really do blend with each other and seems like compatible in mostly everything. He seems okay for me since he told me before that if we will be together then he will not control my life. He will be my partner and not a master to obey in every way. Last week he told me his biggest secret. He told me that he is a Paraphilia patient. Lots of doctor in his country Australia try to cure him and what he found out is he can be okay if he saw his partner or the girl he really likes the most doing intimate activities with somebody else. He said that his being paraphiliac will be lessen if he will feel jealous. and since he likes me a lot, he requested me to do flirty things with another guy while he watching us on cam. I find it awkward really and so hard to believe but he told me that it is the only way for him to feel okay. He said he will just ask me to do it once. Im doing a research about it but I cant still understand it completely. Is it true? Will he be okay if I do what he wants me to do? Will he only ask me to do it once or most of the time? Will he be a good partner to me and not act violently? It's not because I'm against with it, I just find it unbelievable. Can somebody help me and try to enlighten me? What do you think? Will he be a good choice for me really?

Paraphilias are treated with therapy. Therapy means he has to talk to and do work with a competent professional. Nothing that you do can change the fact that he has a paraphilia and he is asking you to be a part of his paraphilic fantasies in a highly manipulative way. That doesn't sound healthy at all and very dishonest. I can't imagine a therapist who would say that his paraphilia could be cured by this sort of activity.

I'm sorry to hear about the situation you are in.

I don't think once would be enough for this manipulative individual. In fact, I'd bet a mortgage that it wouldn't be. He's got behavioural problems, rather than an actual paraphilia, and as long as your with him, he's going to be asking you to do things with other blokes. My worry is, that what he asks you to do will progressively get worse and worse for you.

Do I think he could be a good choice for you really? No. Quite frankly.

sarahjanenigad wrote:I have known a guy couple of weeks ago. He is nice and quite a good catch for someone like me who wants to settle down. We really do blend with each other and seems like compatible in mostly everything. He seems okay for me since he told me before that if we will be together then he will not control my life. He will be my partner and not a master to obey in every way. Last week he told me his biggest secret. He told me that he is a Paraphilia patient. Lots of doctor in his country Australia try to cure him and what he found out is he can be okay if he saw his partner or the girl he really likes the most doing intimate activities with somebody else. He said that his being paraphiliac will be lessen if he will feel jealous. and since he likes me a lot, he requested me to do flirty things with another guy while he watching us on cam. I find it awkward really and so hard to believe but he told me that it is the only way for him to feel okay. He said he will just ask me to do it once. Im doing a research about it but I cant still understand it completely. Is it true? Will he be okay if I do what he wants me to do? Will he only ask me to do it once or most of the time? Will he be a good partner to me and not act violently? It's not because I'm against with it, I just find it unbelievable. Can somebody help me and try to enlighten me? What do you think? Will he be a good choice for me really?

I'm sorry to burst your bubble but... He seems to be very manipulative, it's not healthy for either of you. If you really like him you should NOT do any of this. He won't be okay by seeing his fantasies come to life. That's not how it works, it really isn't. I'm sorry, it seems like you found the guy you've been looking for, but this isn't it.

I'm sorry but what he is doing is making you an "actress" of his fantasies.
Being a paraphiliac myself, I dont think it could be helpful for him, as indulging is not exactly very comfortable to many of us, plus it will be very challenging for you.
It doesn't work and I believe he lies. I have never heard of a therapy where acting on your fantasies can cure you. I actually dont even believe a paraphilia could be cured, it can only be controlled and it's not by indulging.

I suggest leaving this guy, immediately. He is trying to deceive you.

Cuckold may be considered a paraphilia by some, but to me it's just a fetish no more requiring counselling than enjoying feather play or having a shoe fetish. Sounds to me like people think if not having sex in the missionary position (male-superior) then it's a paraphilia and people need counselling.