I'm a pedophile and wish I wasn't.

cheex, please don't listen to this a**hole bashing you. There are many people here wanting to support you. I believe that here we're all like a big family, supporting each other, helping each other go through the darkest moments of our lives, this is why we are here. We shouldn't judge anyone, we all here deal with a paraphilia (most of us are pedophiles here) and share the same disgrace: being hated by society.

sleeper...I don't understand why you're here...and stop being such a judgemental idiot. We're looking for support, we don't need people bashing us in a forum that is meant to help us go through the sh*t we have to bear for our entire lives! We have enough of that, hated by society in our everyday lives, if we come here, we come to escape from that situation and meet in an online place so we all can peacefully discuss about our paraphilias, and we're supposed to support each other no matter what the paraphilia is and no matter who we are, we're just supposed to be supportive to others...ok?? Get it?? If you just came here to insult pedophiles, just go away! If you have a paraphilia and came here to discuss about it (I doubt it) then you understand nothing of how a supportive community works. It's just a shame.

What you say is absolutely out of place! We like children so we check them out, as long as no harm is done to them, we're free of being attracted to whoever we want! We aren't discussing about child molestation here (something we clearly don't support here, something we condemn - if you don't believe it then read our posts and even the forum rules) nor we are exchanging CP material (other thing we condemn). Yes, we're pedophiles and we're against child molestation and CP, don't believe it??? This could be the right place to change your views about us, instead of being brainwashed by the media...

No random person in a public place goes out with a writing on their faces saying "I GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO LOOK AT ME". A person is free to look at who they're attracted to, and as long as no harm is done then it is fine. Unless you're a sexually repressed individual, I'm sure you look at who you find attractive too. If we find children attractive, it's just the way we're born, not our faults, we didn't choose it and many of us would even change if there was an opportunity, but we don't even have this choice since pedophilia (the TRUE pedophilia) is a sexual orientation and therefore it cannot be changed.

Now, nobody gives you PERMISSION to bash a forum member because of his condition.

Yes, we're pedophiles and we're against child molestation and CP, don't believe it??? This could be the right place to change your views about us, instead of being brainwashed by the media...

The only one here who is bashing is you & quite nastily so
I am showing the other side of what the reality is also , a discussion is possible if you were to try & think about someone other than YOUr self

That children ( just as adults should have the right ) to say NO to being perved upon !
My view is valid & is also jsut stating that I think that it is wrong to be perving on children IN THIS MANNER
( as mentioned if out in the open) & clothed IT is more appropriate than having access to kids you can see each week & become attached to one in reality ( who you like seeing & perving on ) regularly
when if this was to happen ( this can / could be a' real risk' to a child ( as it can then become obsessional

nobody gives you PERMISSION to bash a forum member because of his condition.

Again not bashing the member am stating my own dislike of the behaviour being conducted

Again all you do is show how much you should NO T be trusted around children ( as all you do is show how much you only think of yourself & the op ) its all about what YOU want & to bad if it does or was to cause harm to others ..( just shows the lack of respect of children in yoru presence & how much you do ONLY sexualize them
Your attracted to children so what do you do ( you surround yourself with access to them ) again it shows just how much you don't care & how it is all about you only & what you want Op ...

Thanks for being a judgmental a**hole. I already feel bad enough about myself. Thanks for making me feel worse.

If you really wanted to stop you would try really
...But instead you continue to choose to act as you do ...No one is making you do what you do ...it is a choice ( a personal one) to go there & watch (knowing full well all it does is stir you up )
Again a alcoholic does not sit around a bar drinking or hang with others ( at first until they have it well under control ) & don't continue to indulge their own addiction ( if they were REALLY trying to break the habit )

What would I be arrested for? I've never molested a child!

Beware if caught by someone else ( you can be reported )
The same laws should be in place also for kids in regards to perving
A grown woman can have someone charged for stalking or 'watching' them ..

Listen... I know that I'm a perv. I wish I wasn't.

Just because your a perve doesn't mean you also have to act like one
someone with integrity would NOT go to such a place to 'look' they would know it is out of line & would indeed remove themselves from the temptation of such ( bc they care more about a kids well being rather than there own self gratification

sleeper^ wrote:I am showing the other side of what the reality is also , a discussion is possible if you were to try & think about someone other than YOUr self

Yes, there are two sides here.

On one side, a person is sexually attracted to naked bodies and wants to look, or even stare, at them. On the other side, the people who are naked may not wish to be looked at, or stared at. You can argue your right to look, but equally others can argue their right to not be looked at.

Is it breaking the law to stare at someone? No, I doubt that it is. But is it kind to stare at someone who is getting changed? These boys are not strippers. They have not chosen to put on a display of their naked bodies for your entertainment.

It is creepy to have people stare at you whilst you are getting changed. If anybody lacks the empathy to understand this, here's an experiment you could try...when you're naked, step out your front door and lock yourself out of your home. Now try to get help from someone to get back inside. People may stare at you, but you will have nowhere to hide and have to deal with it. Then imagine being a child in the same situation.

Platypus wrote:On one side, a person is sexually attracted to naked bodies and wants to look, or even stare, at them.

But who said anything about staring? I'm not staring. I'm simply taking a glance when they're not noticing.

Platypus wrote:Is it breaking the law to stare at someone? No, I doubt that it is. But is it kind to stare at someone who is getting changed? These boys are not strippers. They have not chosen to put on a display of their naked bodies for your entertainment.

They understand full well that they are changing out in the open and that people might happen to see them. If it bothers them so much, there are stalls they can go into.

Platypus wrote:It is creepy to have people stare at you whilst you are getting changed.

Again... I am not talking about staring. I'm talking about taking brief glances. Big difference.

Platypus wrote:If anybody lacks the empathy to understand this, here's an experiment you could try...when you're naked, step out your front door and lock yourself out of your home. Now try to get help from someone to get back inside. People may stare at you, but you will have nowhere to hide and have to deal with it. Then imagine being a child in the same situation.

This is like comparing apples to oranges. It is completely appropriate for people to be naked in a locker room because they are changing. It's not a "public" place. Standing outside my home naked is against the law because it's indecent exposure. When people are naked in a locker room, it's perfectly normal and is not indecent exposure. These situations are very different.

Again - I am not staring at these boys. I take quick glances, enjoy what I'm looking at, quickly look away, and move on. I do not make these boys uncomfortable, and they know full well that they might be seen naked. Heck... some of them even take showers naked (open showers at this facility). But then again, it's perfectly normal to take showers naked. Right? How can anyone not think someone might happen to take a peek and look at them "down there"?

I am sick enough that I have these feelings and attractions, but I'm not paranoid enough to just avoid going and working out.

cheex_79 wrote:But who said anything about staring?

You did:

cheex_79 wrote:I do my best to not stare and try to do it when they're not looking my way

If you knew you weren't doing anything wrong, you wouldn't need to wait until they were looking away.

cheex_79 wrote:This is like comparing apples to oranges. It is completely appropriate for people to be naked in a locker room because they are changing. It's not a "public" place. Standing outside my home naked is against the law because it's indecent exposure. When people are naked in a locker room, it's perfectly normal and is not indecent exposure. These situations are very different.

You are looking at this from an 'I'm not breaking the law by looking at naked boys' angle. That's not what my example was about. Stop thinking about you. Think about the boys. The example was to help you to think about how they might feel; to help you empathise with them.

cheex_79 wrote: I do not make these boys uncomfortable

How can you know this?

cheex_79 wrote:I'm not paranoid enough to just avoid going and working out.

I think that's good. I see no reason why you should stay at home and avoid people.

The more you see them the more you will want them. Just as an alcoholic would be better off avoiding public bars, so you should avoid children, especially without much clothes on.

It is not OK to perve on them, they are innocent children. It would not be healthy for them to become aware of you watching and it is also detrimental for them to ignore their feelings if they are getting any vibes.

Whilst it may not be your fault you have this problem, it surely is not theirs.

I don't think the OP doesnt know that it is not right to perv onlittle boys but I dont think you people should repeat it obsessively as it could make him feel worse.

cheex you could try to focus on something else while in the locker room, I know the temptation is strong but it is harmful to you to feed your desires. Just try hard to focus on something else. It is much better for you, much healthier.

The OP didnt say that he hangs out in locker rooms waiting to look at boys. He made the point that he knows he has an attraction to boys and gave that as one example of what makes him wish he WASN'T a pedophile. Can you all stop focusing on that and look at the bigger picture that he is looking for people to try and help him avoid acting on these feelings not judge him for the things that he feels guilty for doing?

JJessx92 wrote:The OP didnt say that he hangs out in locker rooms waiting to look at boys. He made the point that he knows he has an attraction to boys and gave that as one example of what makes him wish he WASN'T a pedophile. Can you all stop focusing on that and look at the bigger picture that he is looking for people to try and help him avoid acting on these feelings not judge him for the things that he feels guilty for doing?

THANK YOU, JJessx92.

-- Mon Sep 16, 2013 4:56 pm --

One thing that's particularly troubling for me is the fact that I'm gay. Most pedophiles (I've heard) are heterosexual men. There are a lot of very ignorant people who seem to think that gay men shouldn't be around kids. They think all gay men are child molesters. Once again, I HAVE NEVER and WILL NEVER do anything to physically harm a child. I DO NOT condone child molestation and find it sickening that there are people who actually do this. All I can do is enjoy seeing good-looking boys and have my own internal fantasies that NO ONE has to know. I don't even talk about this with my significant other of 7 years. Pedophilia is such a taboo thing and people are judged so harshly for it. (See the judgmental comments above.)

There are other places where boys I'm attracted to might be wearing little clothing... like, say, the beach. Should I avoid going to the beach because there might happen to be boys there that I'm attracted to? No. I refuse to buy into that. Again... I can enjoy looking but know that I can never touch. And to the person who said I should be arrested... what the hell... what would I be arrested FOR? Is it a crime to simply look at someone I'm attracted to? Seriously... there is a lot of ignorance and judgmental attitudes among people who have posted. I'm starting to think I should not have even mentioned anything about this because I don't need this crap. (Thanks to the few who are being supportive and not giving me a hard time about this.)

Every one of us who is posting in this forum has psychological issues they are dealing with. Who's to say my pedophilia is worse than any psychological conditions the rest of you have? It bothers me that I feel this way, but it doesn't cripple me to the point where I can't live my life. My reason for coming on here to talk about this was to vent my frustrations and ask how others deal with it - NOT to be condemned.

cheex, just leave judgemental people alone, they are the only ones who deserve to be condemned!