73% say pedophilia is not wrong, according to debate.org

73 percent of respondants say pedophilia (the attraction, not the practice of it) is not wrong, according to debate.org.

Is this result surprising to you?

As I've said before here, things really do seem to be slowly moving in the direction of pedophiles being accepted for what they are, which cannot be changed. That is, people who are attracted to children.

According to experts, an increasing in public understanding and acceptance of pedophiles for what they are (but not any possible illegal actions) will encourage many more of those attracted to children to seek help and support before they ever act on it with a child (they will be more comfortable because they are no longer being treated like a witch). This is good for pedophiles, children, and society as a whole.

What do you think about this? Have you noticed this change slowly happening? Have you maybe even tried to help it along with supporting comments on websites when the opportunity arises, as I have?


Here is the result:

Is being sexually attracted to children (pedophilia) wrong?

A majority of 73 percent say simply being a pedophile, but not acting on it with children is not wrong.

While a minority of 27 percent think you are somehow at fault for something you cannot change. A lot of these same people probably think it's wrong to be gay, as well. We're supposed to be past hating people for what they are nowadays (as opposed to their actions). Pedophiles won't remain the only exception to this forever.


http://www.debate.org/opinions/is-being ... ilia-wrong

Wow I'm very surprised at 73%! Which country was it aimed at?

Personally I haven't noticed any acceptance what so ever in the UK. We have a newspaper called the sun which absolutely loves to report on pedophiles and sex offenders. I'm not saying it shouldn't be reported, but the way they do it is full of hatred. And it means that those who read it jump on the band wagon and also become full of hatred. They once printed a map of the UK with a red dot in every area that a sex offender lives - the map was almost 100% full of red dots. Even I got caught up in the hatred and felt so angry that I'm gonna be scared to let my child play outside etc. But I found this forum so I'm not like that anymore.

And no, I haven't supported the change that is slowly happening because I haven't noticed it. But if the opportunity arose, I'd happily post a supporting comment

MariaBee wrote:Wow I'm very surprised at 73%! Which country was it aimed at?

Personally I haven't noticed any acceptance what so ever in the UK. We have a newspaper called the sun which absolutely loves to report on pedophiles and sex offenders. I'm not saying it shouldn't be reported, but the way they do it is full of hatred. And it means that those who read it jump on the band wagon and also become full of hatred. They once printed a map of the UK with a red dot in every area that a sex offender lives - the map was almost 100% full of red dots. Even I got caught up in the hatred and felt so angry that I'm gonna be scared to let my child play outside etc. But I found this forum so I'm not like that anymore.

And no, I haven't supported the change that is slowly happening because I haven't noticed it. But if the opportunity arose, I'd happily post a supporting comment

Thanks for your support in this! It's also bad that they hype it up so much, because child molestation doesn't happen any more than it ever did. It's just the media likes to hype it up and people think they can't even let their kids play outside anymore. But it's no more dangerous, in reality, than it was decades ago. Media induced fear is taking away kids freedom to just be kids in this way.

It also makes a lot of men afraid to even interact with kids in normal ways, for fear of being thought a pedo. There have been tests where a man wouldn't even help a kid who needed it because of this fear. It is known to be very important to kids to have adult male role models in their lives, in addition to female ones. That's the way it was meant to be. But many men now are avoiding kids because of the huge over-hyped hysteria about pedophiles.

We really are mostly pretty normal and reasonable people. And the whole issue can be dealt with in a much more calm and rational way without all this fear and paranoia. Everyone would be better off. Look up Dr. Cantor, he is one of the main pedophilia experts in the world and he actually agrees with almost everything I've said. In fact, that's where I got a lot of this information, was from him.

Yeah you're right. The media influences people so much but they still hold a lot of power. If we all stopped watching the news and reading newspapers, we'd all be happier but we'd be clueless about what's going on all over the world. Having said that, the UK news loves to make a fuss when a British soldier dies in Afghanistan, but doesn't bother talking about the huge number of civilians that the British kill every day. I'm not saying the soldiers aren't worthy of making the news, but I just think that they were prepared to die for their country so don't be so shocked when it actually happens. So regardless of how much we watch the news, we'll never know what's really going on over the world.

Anyway I've gone wayyyy off topic.. It's really sad that men feel afraid to behave in certain ways in case they're accused of being a pedophile. It's really not fair. But that's the world we live in I suppose. I'm not even surprised at that; I'd be the same if I was a man.

That's what I've finally come to realise; pedophiles are regular people, they deserve respect just like everyone else! And this Dr. Cantor, he's an expert, so does he try to bring about the change? More acceptance of pedophiles? And just out of curiosity, is he a pedophile himself?

MariaBee wrote:Yeah you're right. The media influences people so much but they still hold a lot of power. If we all stopped watching the news and reading newspapers, we'd all be happier but we'd be clueless about what's going on all over the world. Having said that, the UK news loves to make a fuss when a British soldier dies in Afghanistan, but doesn't bother talking about the huge number of civilians that the British kill every day. I'm not saying the soldiers aren't worthy of making the news, but I just think that they were prepared to die for their country so don't be so shocked when it actually happens. So regardless of how much we watch the news, we'll never know what's really going on over the world.

Anyway I've gone wayyyy off topic.. It's really sad that men feel afraid to behave in certain ways in case they're accused of being a pedophile. It's really not fair. But that's the world we live in I suppose. I'm not even surprised at that; I'd be the same if I was a man.

That's what I've finally come to realise; pedophiles are regular people, they deserve respect just like everyone else! And this Dr. Cantor, he's an expert, so does he try to bring about the change? More acceptance of pedophiles? And just out of curiosity, is he a pedophile himself?

He isn't a pedophile, as far as I know. But here is an interview with him that I posted before:

paraphilias/topic122688.html

He is actually the source for some of my views. He says we should respect pedophiles as people, but support them in controlling their urges, if they need help. As it is now, the hate and misunderstanding is too thick for many to come forward. They are just too afraid that they won't get fair treatment. I share this fear, myself.

But the reason I say it may be slowly changing is that when I read discussion and news sites, I often see comments that correct people when they say all pedophiles are bad people. In reality, many don't act on their sexual preference their whole lives. I didn't remember often seeing these types of comments on pedophilia related stories until the last couple of years.

I've also seen a lot more articles in the last few years like the one linked above, that are more understanding about pedophiles than ones in the past. Not portraying them all as just a bunch of monsters like they used to. It's a more complicated issue than that. Not so black and white as most might think. And that's starting to be reflected more, at least in some online media.

And speaking of media, I think we could still stay informed without relying on the mainstream media so much. We do have the internet now. We could rely more on independent sites, and independent reporters than we do now, and get larger, more diverse sets of views, instead of how the mainstream media often is mostly all the same.

But back on topic, some of the prominate people that work with pedophiles are way more understanding about their condition than the general public. I would be much happier if the general public viewed pedophiles more like these experts do, as people who could use some support. And not having to deal with people saying to my face that all pedophiles should be killed, not even aware they are talking to one. It's a really depressing situation.

I can't say I've noticed anything myself, I guess it depends where you look. There are still a lot of outdated opinions in people's minds, even if the tide did turn media-wise, it will take even longer for your average person to catch up. Then there will still be the old re-runs of the propaganda-spewing crime shows however, making all pedophiles seem like dangerously disturbed individuals that should always be treated like scum. I have read a few news articles around here where pedophile and a (in this case, situational) child molester have been used interchangeably.

I feel like it's one of those things that becomes inevitable however, there needs to be more consciousness about the subject and what it actually is. Especially in that it isn't a crime in itself to feel that way, it can't be helped. The services should be available to help these people. But it seems so many would rather not even approach the subject or deal with them. The interesting thing is that it's more based on "because of what others will think if I do" rather than an individual's thought on the subject, which I believe more often than not, isn't as despised and disgusted as you'd think from what the media presents. This is probably why on the forums, it's easier to discuss, everyone is relatively anonymous and can say what they think. Put them all in the room and I bet more than half wouldn't say a word.

My only concern is, what about the times when an actual pedophile does commit a crime, you can't truly differentiate between the two things 100% of the time, and people are really going to have a difficult time understanding that. It's really hard to argue that, "well he's an actual pedophile, that means he cares too much about kids to act out on it" every single time. Just food for thought..

callano wrote:I can't say I've noticed anything myself, I guess it depends where you look. There are still a lot of outdated opinions in people's minds, even if the tide did turn media-wise, it will take even longer for your average person to catch up. Then there will still be the old re-runs of the propaganda-spewing crime shows however, making all pedophiles seem like dangerously disturbed individuals that should always be treated like scum. I have read a few news articles around here where pedophile and a (in this case, situational) child molester have been used interchangeably.

I feel like it's one of those things that becomes inevitable however, there needs to be more consciousness about the subject and what it actually is. Especially in that it isn't a crime in itself to feel that way, it can't be helped. The services should be available to help these people. But it seems so many would rather not even approach the subject or deal with them. The interesting thing is that it's more based on "because of what others will think if I do" rather than an individual's thought on the subject, which I believe more often than not, isn't as despised and disgusted as you'd think from what the media presents. This is probably why on the forums, it's easier to discuss, everyone is relatively anonymous and can say what they think. Put them all in the room and I bet more than half wouldn't say a word.

My only concern is, what about the times when an actual pedophile does commit a crime, you can't truly differentiate between the two things 100% of the time, and people are really going to have a difficult time understanding that. It's really hard to argue that, "well he's an actual pedophile, that means he cares too much about kids to act out on it" every single time. Just food for thought..

It's true that it's mainly an internet thing. You won't see people defending the majority of pedos as decent people in real life. On the internet, I've seen more of that over the years, though.

And no I haven't been trying to make an argument that all pedos are good, if that's what you thought (I've only said the majority, not all), of course sometimes pedos really are bad. But the media has that side of things already more than covered (and covered and covered) to the point where people think all pedophiles are bad. And it's not true. Most are non-practicing and don't hurt anyone. I think it's fair that people know this.

A lot of people even think that being a pedophile means you automatically go around grabbing and molesting and raping kids. That's a long way from how most pedophiles are. Most don't molest at all.

People even think not only that, but when they are caught and eventually released from prison, that they "RE-OFFEND 100% OF THE TIME!!!" (really it's less than other criminals), according to some people's hysterical views. That's just not even realistic or in line with reality at all. Pedophiles are not zombies. I don't know about you, but I'm tired of being thought of as some kind of uncontrollable monster/zombie/witch.

Some pedos are fine with this, I suppose. But I think allowing these lies and very exaggerated views to persist unchallenged just contributes to self-hatred, which can cause desperatation and becoming more likely to reoffend. Please look up the pedophilia expert Dr. James Cantor. He promotes a more realistic view and agrees with much of what I have said. Many of my views I got from him.

There's some country where pedophilia is not wrong, it's also related with religion. I really don't remember which country it is, but I guess those opinions (about 'pedophilia not being wrong') should be of people from there. Since most people have exactly the same opinion about pedophilia, it's not wrong to deduce that.

But eh, Callano pretty much said it all. As long as you keep to yourself, it's not wrong. But don't expose yourself to everyone, expecting them to accept you.

There are a FEW countries where pedophilia is acceptable. My mother's friend is Nigerian and she was telling me that in more rural areas a lot of young girls from age 10+ are already married, especially to men who practice polygamy (which there is a lot of). It's not only acceptable, it is encouraged. A man will come see her and if he finds her attractive he'll make an offer to her family to take her. I suppose one has to practice a bit of cultural relativism. Even AS a pedophile, the feminist in me finds the practice reprehensible.

And with that percentage....I'm very shocked. I think it's encouraging...but it's still not a secret I see myself telling too many people.

xoPinkerbelleox wrote:
My mother's friend is Nigerian and she was telling me that in more rural areas a lot of young girls from age 10+ are already married, especially to men who practice polygamy (which there is a lot of). It's not only acceptable, it is encouraged. A man will come see her and if he finds her attractive he'll make an offer to her family to take her. I suppose one has to practice a bit of cultural relativism

I've heard of this too, specially in Brazil. My grandmother, was forcing my mom (who was 12 y-o) to marry a man, who was 52 year old, and you know, he was rich. I don't understand how can someone encourage a child to marry a man, but eh...there's retarded people everywhere.